YOGYAKARTA In certain limits, self-sacred for others can be natural. But for altruistic people, or people who often sacrifice themselves for others, it can be toxic, irrational, and excessive. According to child psychiatrist Christine BL Adams, MD., making excessive sacrifices can harm the giver because they ignore their own needs. For the recipient, it is also dangerous because they have to accept other people's sacrifices first and then fulfill their needs.
Because for both parties, sacrifices can be toxic, so identify the cause so that it can be managed and become a better self in the future.
Toxic philanthropists are people who take too many projects both at home and at work. They try to do a job of two or three people. Maybe, according to Adams as reported by Psychology Today, Friday, August 11, they feel responsible for work that is not even their domain.
Like a dark alley that never finds an end. When someone sacrifices excessively, they quickly experience fatigue. In the fatigue, they try to maintain a project that is considered beneficial for others. This can cause stress and psychological difficulties.
People who sacrifice too much tend to have perfectionism. They want to pay attention to others with 'perfect' when it's impossible. People who make excessive sacrifices may also be driven by a sense of guilt for failing to provide perfectity'.
Sincere sacrifices do not expect anything. But for someone who sacrifices themselves to others excessively, maybe because they hope to be respected and admired. For example, by being generous, others will return the favor.
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Paying attention to yourself is important. If self-care is unbalanced and pays more attention to others than yourself, then people will pay excessive attention. In fact, according to Adams, people who give excessively are not good at meeting their own needs. For example, the need for comfort, health, relaxation, vacation, sleep, and exercise. Instead of meeting their needs, they tend to meet the needs of others.
After knowing why a person sacrifices himself excessively to others described above, you can use it as a reference for self-reflection. It is important to know, meeting your needs needs to be done before helping others. That way, you do not feel burdened and more sincere in the bond of giving each other.
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