Researchers Find Two Signs Of The Most Suitable Person To Be A Confused Friend

Friends illustration (Photo: Freepik/Freepik)

JAKARTA - In every circle of friendship, there is usually always one person who is a place to vent. This person has an aura that makes anyone feel safe to share secrets and contents of the heart, without ever having to ask questions.

Many think this ability is a natural talent, something they have since birth. But it turns out that science says otherwise.

According to psychological research, there are two main traits that can make a person trusted to be a place to vent. The good news is, these two traits are not something that is built-in but can be trained and developed over time.

By practicing it, we can deepen friendship and become more meaningful for others.

Here are two characteristics of someone who is trusted to be a friend to vent, as reported by the Forbes page.

1. Smart People Understand Other People's Feelings (Empathy)

Empathy is not just understanding what other people feel, but also feeling these emotions. This is a bridge that connects one person's heart with another. When showing empathy, we give a message that the feelings of our friends are important and they are not alone.

A meta-analytical in 2016 published in the Journal of Counseling Psychology shows that the ability of empathy can be improved through special training (emanghy training). This means that anyone can learn to be more sensitive to the feelings of others if there are intentions and exercises.

One simple way to train empathy is to use open questions. For example, instead of asking 'Are you sad, huh?', try asking, 'How do you care about that time?' or According to you, what next step do you want to take?.

Questions like this make it space for your friend to talk deeper and feel really heard.

2. Strict But Still Appreciating (Assertive) people

When talking about good friends, maybe an assertive is not the first thing to think about. But research shows that an assertive person can actually be an extraordinary listener and advisor.

A 2018 study published in the Nationality and Social Psychology Bulletin found people who were assertive had a strong urge to act. This means that they are not only listening, but can also provide input, solutions, and encouragement to act.

Asertive friends are usually also good at communicating clearly and dare to discuss sensitive things without offending them. They are able to balance between being good listeners and honest advisors.