JAKARTA - Increasing the quality of communication between parents and adolescents can create a comfortable atmosphere for teenagers to express their feelings.
According to Professor of the Faculty of Psychology, University of Indonesia, Prof. Dr. Rose Mini Agoes Salim, M.Psi., this method can help children avoid the habit of harboring emotions.
"Remaja cannot be treated continuously like a child. There are times when they are positioned as friends, so that a close relationship between parents and children is created. This attachment should be built from a young child, so that they feel comfortable talking anything," said Prof. Rose, who is familiarly called Romi, as quoted by Antara.
Romi, who is also an education psychology lecturer, added that the parenting that parents apply to teenagers greatly affects their comfort in speaking and sharing stories.
Parents who use a democratic or authoritative parenting approach, for example, tend to provide space for dialogue and discussions with their children in determining various agreements. However, parents still hold the role of the main decision maker, he said.
On the other hand, permissive parenting or overfreedom can make parents tend to follow their child's wishes without restrictions, or even be neglected to the needs and opinions of their child. Romi emphasized that parents must be able to adapt their parenting to their child's specific needs.
When teenagers are not given space to engage in family discussions or don't feel free to express their feelings, they have the potential to harbor emotions and show behavioral changes.
For example, children who are usually active and like to socialize suddenly withdraw, avoid eating together, are reluctant to talk, or are indifferent even though they were previously friendly. This can be a sign that something is disturbing his thoughts or feelings," Romi explained.
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He also emphasized the importance of parents' empathy for the various problems faced by teenagers. By increasing empathy, children will be more open in conveying what they feel and want.
In communicating with children, Romi suggested that parents not always use high notes, but try to understand the child's feelings.
"When parents can understand their child's feelings, communication will become more effective. Parents also need to see problems from their child's point of view, not only from their own perspective," he concluded.
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