Can't Let Go Of Anger Even Though It's Declining, It Turns Out That These Are 4 Causes

Illustration of the cause of not being able to let go of anger even though it is already chronic (Freepic/stockking)

YOGYAKARTA "Still annoyed because of what happened years ago, it turns out that it's not without reason. If you haven't been able to let go of anger because of something that happened in the past, here's what triggers it.

Lack of closing the past causes a person to still not be able to let go of anger. Whether it's an argument or disappointment, it needs to be discussed. Why is it necessary, because it is important to express your opinion and reveal stories from your point of view. To close the past that makes you angry, you can follow the recommendations of clinical psychologist Bob Taibbi, LSCW.

He suggests writing a letter to someone who makes you angry. The letter focuses on the emotions you feel, not correcting facts.

Not opening up to other people's perspectives can make it difficult to get rid of anger. Often, when we leave a relationship, the story is too simplified or black-and-white and leaning as a victim. It's important to realize that life events are more complex, not just a conclusion you are most hurt by the events you experience.

The solution suggested by Taibbi, reported by Psychology Today, Monday, April 1, investigate the motives of other people's behavior that makes you angry. Try to see from their point of view, be honest with yourself about your role in the outcome, look for what prevents you from becoming more sympathetic to others.

With more complex and realistic stories to replace old stories, you collect and apply lessons from your relationship to your next relationship and may even be grateful for what this life experience has taught you.

Things that trigger anger can be because the previous relationship left the same wound. Facing loss, makes you feel sad least. But it's important to end old wounds by repairing and listening to yourself. It's also important to realize and change the way you run your relationship to prevent the recurrence of the same wound in a new relationship.

A person can keep anger and it is difficult to let go for years, it can be because it is too stressed. Usually it is triggered by a moment, such as an argument with your partner. Even if it is triggered by a trivial thing, but an argument when you are stressed, it can invite memories of the past that make you angry.

Prolonged anger is not a problem but a result of emotional problems and good relationships both in the present and in the past. It is very important to find out the cause of anger that settles. More importantly understanding that, the past can be a valuable lesson for us to know how to live a better life.