JAKARTA - Why do people maintain a relationship, even though the relationship is no longer fun and even tends to be toxic? A new study shows that this can happen because people who are entangled in toxic relationships think that separation can have a bad impact on their partners.

Research published in the November 2018 edition of the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, explores the possibility that people who decide to end a relationship not only consider their own desires. But also how much the desire and need of their partner to continue the relationship.

"The more people who depend on believing that their partner still wants to get involved in the relationship, the less likely they will be to decide on a breakup," said Samantha Joel, assistant professor at Western University in Ontario, Canada and lead author in the study, quoted from the Medical Express page, Wednesday, November 22.

Previous research shows the amount of time, energy, and emotion invested in a relationship can be a factor in deciding to end a romantic relationship. Research also shows that a person may choose to stay in a toxic relationship for fear of being alone, having a hard time finding a new partner, and feeling inferior to his appearance.

In that case, the decision to stay or leave is based on personal interests, Joel said. However, this new study shows the first evidence that decisions regarding unsatisfactory romantic relationships may involve altruistic components.

"When people feel that their partner is very committed to their relationship, it is unlikely that they will cut ties," Joel said.

This applies even to people who are not truly committed to the relationship or who are personally dissatisfied with the relationship. Generally, they don't want to hurt their partner and care about what they want, "sa,bung Joel."

In making that choice, unhappy couples may hope their relationship will improve, Joel said.

"One thing that is not known is how accurate the person's perception is," said Joel.

"It could be that they overestimate their partner's commitment and how painful the separation is," continued Joel.

Decide to stay in a toxic relationship based on the perception of the couple's dependence on the relationship can be a double-edged sword, Joel said. If the relationship improves, it is a good decision. But if not, the unhealthy relationship will continue.

There is also a question whether it persists for the sake of a partner is really a prosocial act? According to Joel, there is no need to be in a relationship even though it is clear that this relationship does not bring happiness to the people involved in it.


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