6 Right Ways To Validate Closest People's Feelings For Warmer Relationships

Illustration of the right way to validate the feelings of those closest to you (Freepik/master1305)

YOGYAKARTA Validating is a way to make people closest to you feel heard, seen, and understood. Skills provide validation that emotions, responses, and experiences make sense, need to be especially had to be applied to those closest to you. According to licensed psychologist Kiki Fehling, Ph.D., validation is a form of emotional setting. This can relieve conflicts and provide support to loved ones who experience painful experiences.

Validation is also the key to building a warm, mutual, and safe relationship. Fehling explained that there is the right way to validate others in the following points.

Many people sit together but are busy with their respective devices. This is an indicator of not being together entirely with other people near you. While validation skills, first, must be fully present. That way people closest to you feel seen and heard. Listen fully and pay full attention before giving validation to that person.

Repeating someone's words shows you listening. With this skill, use the words exactly the same as those used by others. Speak up in any way you feel more comfortable and be honest in the conversation while explicitly showing that you are listening.

It is important to recognize the situation that people closest to you are going through. Because this will determine when the time is right to provide validation, method, and choice of words. When trying to validate, it's important to 'turn your mind'. If, identify the emotions of those closest to you. If you don't know that person well, or you're not sure about his feelings, ask him a question in order to give the person a chance to talk about his emotions.

When validating the experiences or feelings of those closest to you, it is important to understand the context. Including feeling what they feel, their history, and their situation. Recognize also the causes, consequences, or triggers.

When you say 'Of course, you feel like that because what you've been through' means you admit that anyone who experiences the same feeling when faced with a difficult situation. Also explain how a person's emotions make sense based on the facts of the situation.

Validation skills, cited from Psychology Today, Thursday, February 8, are about treating others equally. Be sincere and react naturally to whatever they share with you. Take their emotions seriously and show affection without making them fragile. Don't forget, validate them while also validating yourself, Fehling said.

That's an important validational skill to pay attention to. It's also important to understand that validation does not mean consent. Even if you disagree, you can still provide validation.