So That You Can Be A Friend, Here Are 9 Tips For Parents To Communicate With Teenagers

JAKARTA - Teenagers have many things in common with the times when children are two years old. During these two stages, children do new interesting things, but there are times when they cross the line. The main development task faced by the two age groups is also the same: children must stay away from their parents and start to emphasize their own independence. No wonder sometimes children act as if they are the center of attention.

This makes parenting complicated, especially as teenagers start making decisions about things that have real consequences, such as school and friends. Not to mention the use of drugs and sex. However, they are not good at managing emotions so that teenagers tend to take risks and make impulsive decisions.

This means that having a healthy and mutual trust relationship between parents during adolescence is becoming more important than ever. However, staying close is not easy. Teenagers are often less friendly when they reject what is considered parental intervention.

Even though they are open to their friends, who are always spoken to via social media, they may be silent when asked by their mother about their day. Requests that seem to make sense to the father may be seen as deep anger.

If this sounds familiar, take a deep breath and remind yourself as a parent that your child is experiencing a challenging teenage period. This is a phase that will pass, and your job as a parent is still very important, it's just that the role may change a little bit. Here are some tips for navigating a new phase of parenting under the MindInstitute, Friday, October 18.

If you want to know what is happening in a teenager's life, asking direct questions may not be as effective as just sitting and listening. Children tend to be more open to their parents if they don't feel pressured to share information.

Remember, spontaneous comments about something that happened that day are their way of reaching out. and you should tend to hear more and show an interest in children's stories.

Often parents tend to try to solve problems for their children or underestimate their disappointment. However, saying something like "They're not right for you" after romantic disappointment can be underestimated. Instead, show your children that you understand and empathize with reflecting their sentiments again: "Wow, what you're going through sounds difficult."

Teenagers want to be taken seriously, especially by their parents. Find a way to show that you trust your teenage children. Asking for help they show that you are relying on them. Providing privileges voluntarily shows that you feel they are capable of dealing with it. Tell your children you believe they will increase their confidence and make it more likely to rise on that occasion.

You can still set the rules, but be prepared to explain it. While pushing boundaries is natural for teens, hearing your wise explanation of why parties at school are not allowed will make the rules seem more reasonable.

Parents tend to praise their children more when they are young, but teenagers also need self-esteem encouragement. Teenagers may act as if they are too cool to care about what their parents think, but actually they still want your approval. And look for opportunities to be positive and give a good spirit to the relationship, especially when the relationship feels tense.

Parents' emotions can easily explode when teenagers are rude, but don't respond in the same way. Remember that you are an adult and they are less capable of controlling emotions or thinking logically when angry. Count up to ten or take a deep breath before responding. If you and your child are too angry to talk, stop the conversation until you have the opportunity to calm yourself down.

Talking isn't the only way to communicate with teenagers and during these years, it would be great if you could spend time doing things you and your kids love, whether it's cooking or climbing a mountain or going to a cinema, without talking about personal matters. It's important for kids to know they can be near you, and share a positive experience, without having to worry parents will ask them questions that annoy them or reprimand them for something.

Sitting down to eat together as a family is another way to stay close. Conversations at dinner give each family member the opportunity to greet each other and talk casually about sports or television or politics. Children who feel comfortable talking to their parents about everyday things tend to be more open when talking about things are more difficult. And remind children not to play with their cellphones during dinner hours.

It's natural for children to experience some changes with age, but pay attention if you see changes in their mood, behavior, energy level, or appetite. Similarly, pay attention if they stop wanting to do things that used to make them happy, or if you see them self-isolating.

If you look at changes in children's daily interests for activities, ask them about it and provide support (without judging). They may need your help.