Getting To Know A Toxic And Unproductive Form Of Communication In Coupled Relations
Illustration of toxic communication in a pairwise relationship (Freepic/Drazen.zigic)

YOGYAKARTA Healthy communication about feelings can produce lasting and warm bonds. But not many couples realize otherwise, toxic communication.

Communicating requires skills. That way, communication in a couple relationship is always healthy and supports the happiness of everyone who is committed. Because the way to communicate even in difficult situations requires skills, then recognize the boundaries that lead to toxic behavior. For example, how do you tell your partner that it has made you angry? Of course it will be very dilemmatic. If you say it wrongly, it can make the situation not getting clearer, it will make it worse.

According to clinical psychologist Jonice Webb, Ph.D., here are ineffective communication and leads to toxic behavior that needs to be recognized and avoided.

Passive-aggressive action is actually not communication to take revenge. For example, one day your partner ignores you at a party. Then you think about giving a lesson to your partner.

Passive Aggression basically tries to correct two mistakes. First, self-error and partner error. But over time, this passive-aggressive way of communication only burdens relationships with negative things.

Aggressive for example communicates by accusing and attacking at inappropriate times, reported by Psychology Today, Friday, June 16. Words, tones, and options to express thoughts about problems must be regulated wisely. Because if your partner feels attacked, injured, and maybe embarrassed, then the goal of communicating the problem will fail actually adds to the problem.

In a sarcastic manner, such as a stab coming from the side. Someone who receives it will feel accused, attacked, and the motive for the defense will increase. Both parties, in fact, did not solve the problem because the intention of communication did not achieve its goals.

Webb explained, as a therapist he found that many couples were greatly influenced by how to deal with emotions at home in their childhood. This affects the way they communicate with their partner. Some families deal with their members' feelings openly and directly by showing comfort and discussing problems and emotions. There are also families who communicate uncomfortable. They neglect to emotionally teach their children emotional communication skills.

Add Webb, good communication skills, many of his advantages. Not only does it help you to be honest with each other but also allows your partner to continue to know each other better.


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