So That Communication Can Be Effective, Do 7 Tricks When Talking To Narcistics

Illustration (Christina Morillo/Pexels)

JAKARTA - As a human being, of course, you want to feel heard, understood, connected, and supported during a conversation. But that doesn't always happen if you talk to people who have a chronic tendency.

Either the person suffers from eccentric personality disorders (NPD) or has a chronic tendency. Knowing what to say and what should not be said can help you and that person communicate more effectively.

"When talking to someone who has eccentric personality disorders, you should use respect and a calm tone of voice," said Katie Ziskind, quoted by Psych Central, Wednesday, January 24.

Ziskind's advice should be to avoid:

"Don't try to fight back, correct them, or embarrass them," added Christine M. Kuperman, marriage therapist, family, and traumatized in California.

This tactic can backfire and can cause further quarrels or rejections.

Some phrases will be more effective in conveying what you want to convey than other phrases. Including the statement me to emphasize your needs, thoughts, and feelings in the relationship.

"Keep your focus on sharing your feelings while showing their shortcomings," said Ziskind.

For example, a statement like 'I don't think you've heard what I've said before' rather than 'You've never listened to me!' can start a more productive and empathetic dialogue.

Ziskind also said that people with eccentric tendencies would usually respond well to the beginning of conversations with words like;

"I think..."

I heard...

"I want..."

"I hope..."

"These are all statements that show self-ownance and self-accountability," he added.

When talking to people who have eccentric traits, you will feel if you express your thoughts, you will appear aggressive. Because you don't want to upset other people," said Kuperman.

But it is also important to speak and confirm on yourself.

To defend yourself, Kuperman suggests recognizing boundaries, repeating points, and staying strong in your position. Even if that person tries to embarrass, blame, or ignite your emotions.

"The first most important step when fostering any type of relationship is that you must have clear boundaries that you make to protect yourself," said Kuperman.

He noted that setting boundaries might look like:

'I will no longer allow you to talk to me like this.'

"I refuse to talk about this if you scream. I will hear if we talk carefully."

You can also try phrases like,

I will not continue this conversation if you continue to insult or underestimate me.

Maintaining your boundaries and a tone of respect can help keep the discussion healthy and productive.

The choice of the language used is very important when talking to people who have a chronic tendency. Some sentences could immediately silence them or make them not listen.

Consider avoiding a statement you always... and you never.... These expressions can cause people withaxisics to be defensive or argumentative.

People with eccentric symptoms tend to avoid being responsible for their own mistakes. As a result, they may try to blame you, even if that's baseless. Try your best to defend yourself and don't take rash action over something that's not your fault.

In the end, you can't change people who live with NPD or the tendency to be eccentric. So, don't spend time and energy trying to change it or believe that maybe one day you can. Let them as good as they are with their personality problems.