YOGYAKARTA Children make mistakes and it's a normal thing. Children's responses to mistakes may be different. Not infrequently children avoid eye contact and laugh sneering when their mistakes are corrected. This incident is often confusing for parents. Feeling worried and wondering, is it the right way to reprimand a child? Will being reprimanded make his heart hurt? Does laughing describe nothing wrong and the various other questions helped by expert in the development of Claire Lerner's child, LSCW-C.
Adults, or parents, are most challenged when interpreting their children's behavior through logic glasses. A child laughing and acting as if they don't care about what mistakes they make, may lead you to assume that the baby has no empathy. But wait, many children are basically very sensitive. They will feel ashamed, laugh, escape, avoid eye contact, which is a coding mechanism. Even though this is not accepted socially, it is in this way relieved the difficult emotional flood.
Cognitively, children know they have done something unacceptable. In these conditions, they do not yet have the skills to stop themselves from acting based on encouragement from their hearts. They engage in all kinds of avoidance to divert stress and discomfort. That way, they deal with their feelings in the way they understand.
This situation can also trigger children to react rudely, such as embarrassing you or getting out of control. Launching Psychology Today, Tuesday, May 2, when the child's brain is flooded with emotion, they can't think clearly so there is no effective correction at that time. So instead of giving a long lecture on boundaries, it's better to give children responsibility for their actions and reflect on their mistakes.
So what needs to be done when your child avoids directions, corrections, or explanations from parents? Obviously Lerner, if your child is laughing, sticking out his tongue, covering his ears, just ignore it. Karema tells him to stop or ask him to stop making the defense stronger. More importantly, make them feel safe first and then say something with full love.
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You need to discuss your child's behavior in a calm situation. Because the natural urge of adults to use logic, then giving lessons when the child's emotions are chaotic will not be received clearly. Next, explain the chronology in detail and make sure that you intend to help, not bully. Don't forget, avoid judging and tell the chronology to embarrass. Then, give the option to apologize and be responsible for correcting his actions.
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