5 Reasons Why Men Are Passive in Love Relationships

Illustration of why men are passive (Freepik/Drazen Zigic)

YOGYAKARTA - Being passive or not taking the initiative in resolving responsibilities, of course, creates conflict. Especially if it happens in a love or household relationship that requires a partnership role in a harmonious relationship.

Robert Taibbi, LSCW., clinical psychologist, found that many couples complain that their husbands or lovers never take the initiative. They tend to be passive in doing heavy work, housework, and don't work together as a team. The following was reported by Psychology Today, Sunday, February 5, the reasons why men tend to be passive and do not take the initiative according to Taibbi's research for years.

1. Thinking too traditional

Not a few men think that if you have worked hard all day, then when you come home you want to relax. Often these attitudes are copied from their parents and ingrained in family or ethnic cultures where one partner is in charge of the entire inside of the house and usually the man deals with the outside like work, cars, yard. Or sometimes, they grow up in families where men and boys are simply pampered, and women do the heavy lifting.

Illustration of why men are passive (Freepik/bearphotos)

2. Feeling criticized, pushed aside, and given up

The second reason why men are passive is because, every time they take a step and start something they encounter rejection or criticism. That way they feel set and stop trying. Not even just men, everyone has the possibility of adopting a 'good do it your way' attitude when they are constantly being criticized and rejected.

3. The relationship is not balanced

An unbalanced relationship departs from a mindset that influences action. When a person does not get what he needs, such as love and attention, he will withdraw and examine himself. Then each party waited for the other to move and the relationship between the two became not harmonious.

4. Fear of conflict

Another cause for a man to be passive is because he is worried about triggering conflict. For example, when initiating an idea, it will make their partner angry or unhappy, triggering a fight, so they choose to hold back.

5. Experiencing attention disorder or ADHD

ADHD (attention deficit disorder) has common symptoms, such as procrastination, forgetting, starting something but not finishing it. As a result, their partners feel the man is unreliable. So, to change patterns like this, focused behavior needs to be based.

Illustration of why men are passive (Freepik/Stockking)

Just like the reasons why men are passive above and this last one, both partners need to communicate with each other so they know the needs that need to be met. So that when mutual criticism, or doubt, both can take the right attitude to prevent conflict because they are less active in making decisions.