YOGYAKARTA A psychotherapist and consultant who has worked for 45 years divides the expression of intimacy into two, namely those committed and episodic. Paul Dunion, Ed.D., explains that intimacy in principle applies boundaries without damaging relationships. So what is the difference between intimacy in committed relations and episodic intimacy? Here's the explanation.

Episodic intimacy generally occurs in friendship. Which is not necessary for effort, time, and energy to support intimacy. However, episodic intimacy can also occur in a marriage. Couples will only allow time to pass and physical distance. They do not develop truly to deepen the relationship. In relationships that have episodic intimacy, it usually has common beliefs and values. But the feasibility and values are diverse, not completely discussed.

Signs of episodic intimacy include talking a little about what partners want with each other, starting to avoid and being reluctant to get into conflict, as well as focusing on offering updates rather than the current life experiences.

Committed relationships, accommodate everyone who sets together to grow and participate with each other. Within committed intimacy, there is mutual initiative to create time together. Interest is also sustainable and one another actively participates in the lives of each other. Both in the emotional, intellectual, and physical aspects.

Another sign of committed intimacy, everyone who is committed to having a little 'true friends' is related to work, time and energy allocation. They are also committed to being involved in conflict accompanied by avoiding the dynamics of winning or losing. A couple who are committed, apply boundaries that support everyone's individualization and the depth qualitas and meaning of the relationship.

Through the short explanation above, it is clear that the firm difference between commitment and episodic intimacy is clear. Episodic integration certainly accommodates couples who live far apart. To provide opportunities to meet, remember, and stay in one another's lives. In contrast to commitment, which offers opportunities to grow, build relational skills, and create deep and meaningful bonds.

According to Dunion, reported by Psychology Today, Monday, July 8, being clear and genuine about the type of intimacy in a desired relationship is important for each partner. It is also important to consider the compatibility, how much time and energy can be allocated, to what extent will the desire to explore together the compatibility in the relationship that will be established.


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