7 Reasons Why Couples Don't Separate Even Though Relationships Are Not Happy

Illustration of the reason why the couple did not separate even though they were not happy (Freepik/Azerbaijan_stockers)

YOGYAKARTA Couple relationships that are emotionally stunned, do not encourage someone to leave or separate. Many people do not choose to separate or even be unable to escape their commitments in a pair relationship.

Emotionally damaging relationships are much more common than most people realize. However, many people were unable to escape. For four decades, clinical psychologist and marriage counselor in Southern California, Randu Gunther, Ph.D., worked with a partner. Many of them seem to be locked in a single relationship and unable to separate. What is the reason a person does not choose to separate even in an unhappy relationship? This is Gunter's explanation.

Couples who are still committed, of course have had the happiest times. This is also the reason they don't choose to separate, explained Gunther as reported by Psychology Today, Monday, May 27, the suffering they feel is a fee for the happiness they have ever felt. They hope, by surviving, they will get their happiness back.

Past experiences and concerns about the future form a person's attitude in choosing the path of life. Someone who doesn't choose to separate even though his relationship is unhappy, maybe also for this reason. Because they have bad past experiences and worry about not finding the best in the future, they choose to survive even though they have to sacrifice the ups and downs of emotional situations for relationships.

Not always in a couple relationship, friendships also experience situations where they do not break their relationship even though they make them disappointed or angry. This is because of the familiarity that has been knitted so that they feel comfortable even though the pain is accompanying the relationship.

According to Gunther, the fourth reason is sad. Because someone knows that they have to leave the relationship to save themselves. But can't help but feel the pain other person might feel when he leaves the relationship.

A social network is needed from a supportive family, friends, or other group to help someone leave a painful relationship. Especially a long-standing relationship. If someone has a broken heart, he may not have a place to turn away. So, someone chooses to stay with their partner, or family, in order to get that support network.

Bonds can be the reason a person does not leave an unhappy relationship. For example, providing support to people who are depressed, traumatized, even perpetrators of violence or drug users. This is an entanglement, for example because of love or it could be because of affection.

It is difficult for anyone to live with discomfort, especially with regard to lack of resources. Split, meaning it requires expensive resources, both about buying a house, meeting daily needs, and other necessities. For this reason, a person persists on commitment and does not leave his relationship even if he is not happy.

Through a list of reasons why couples, family, or friends' relationships are not cut off even if they are not happy. That is, everyone compromises in their lives at a time. The sacrifice, maybe comfort and a low pace of emotions and then dives sharply.