Emotional Wounds Make You Afraid To Be Close To Others, Follow How To Overcome

Illustration of fear of being close and tied to others (Freepik/garetsvisual)

YOGYAKARTA Emotional wounds in the past, often do not realize how it affects a person in his attitude. It even makes a person avoid situations that trigger pain to return. This wound, for example because it has a bad relationship, makes a person reluctant to be close to other people or commit. So why are you afraid of intimacy, the type of intimacy, and how to deal with it? Here's the full explanation check.

Personal relationships or closeness to someone make you feel safe, supported, and bound. Closer attachment can develop. Not necessarily related to sexual intimacy, there are also types of intimacy that are divided into several categories, including the following.

The intellectual association is connected through ideas, morals, beliefs, thoughts, and opinions. This means that by having the same ideas or thoughts and completing two people or more can be related.

Confidence allows two people to share vulnerabilities and expression of feelings. Then it can make each other feel safe.

If two people have the same life experience and are of common interest, they can establish a commitment. It can also be connected through certain activities.

Physical and sexual intimacy is generally owned by couples who have mutual consent or consent. To what extent can the two of them make each other safe, fun, and in touch or have physical and sexual relationships.

The four types of relationships above, one of which may make a person afraid to establish because of emotional injuries in the past. Brenda Wade, a relationship expert and a San Francisco Bay Area-based psychologist, said. People who live with fear of intimacy are often afraid of being hurt emotionally. Launching PsychCentral, Thursday, March 16, it means that apart from past experiences that shaped fear also made a person reluctant to establish intimacy.

Without realizing it, when feeling a certain condition of feelings, it can be a sign of fear of establishing closeness. Signs such as skepticism when given praise or disclosure of love for you, suspicion of motives for relationships, emotional outbursts or relationships cycles, sabotaging, withdrawing from physical contact, and decreasing effective communication.

Is it afraid of being in a relationship and afraid of being abandoned, the same? Fear of intimacy can also involve feelings of abandonment, but fear of neglect or anxiety of separation is not the same as fear of intimacy.

Jason Polk, a clinical social worker, relationship coach, and owner of the Colorado Relationship Recovery in Denver, said fear of intimacy was a mechanism for self-protection. He said this is a reflex that is more common in the style of anxiety-ambivalent engagement. This develops usually because of the neglect experience of growing up.

"To overcome the fear of being tied to someone, first of all you have to look at your own history and the conscious patterns you've developed," said Wade.

Here you need a third person, or professional help, so that it can be cured appropriately and gently. You can also learn how to do it in therapy to improve self-esteem, love yourself more and develop interests. Several other alternatives that might help, such as creating positive journals, actively exercising, exploring creative energy, and learning to improve yourself. That way, emotional wounds that cause fear of being close to others can be overcome.