7 Lessons From Past Love For New, More Harmonious Relations

Illustration of lessons from the past for new, more harmonious relations (Freepik/prostoleh)

YOGYAKARTA Throughout the phase of life, learning needs to be done. By learning, one can overcome trauma, fear, and manage emotions. If the relationship of the past has or has often failed, expert tips, don't stop learning. For this reason, there are lessons that can be absorbed from past relationships to establish a new, more harmonious relationship below.

Love stories are difficult regardless of thoughts, unsafe feelings, and beliefs about yourself. These three things include previous love experiences, but their origin is not from love itself, said John Kim's therapist and life coach, LMFT. Toxisity does not come from love but comes from lack of self-awareness and relationship dynamics.

As is jealousy, which comes from our own unsafe feelings and ultimately triggers quarrels and even disharmony in relationships. Tip Kim, be aware of your mindset and question whether what happened was true. This is the first lesson of a relationship that has failed in the past.

Many people imagine the perfect romance. In fact, no human being is perfect, so a plenary story only exists in the story. Kim's message, it is important for everyone to be open to their partner. Perfect imagination is okay, but learning from the past is even more important. That way, the new relationship will feel fresher and different.

Like onions, the first layer is the skin, not lust but lust, connection, chemical work, and butterfly flying in the stomach. Love doesn't happen until all the layers are peeling off. In other words, until you look at everyone's side and accept it, embrace it, then choose to love it. Love, according to Kim reported by Psychology Today, Thursday, June 8, is jointly going through the whole layer with aspects in each of those layers.

Relationships may once be filled with doubt, but there are things that need to be recognized for sure. If you and your partner really love each other, the two of you will work together. So, harmonious couples will try, try, communicate, not hide or show their feelings through behavior.

The route of life is so dynamic, for that everyone needs to learn to continue to grow. Likewise in a romantic relationship, sometimes after falling it takes time to release, heal, then bounce back. No one is really ready for a failure in a relationship. Nor is anyone ready to build a new relationship. But because it will never be perfect, hard efforts are needed in trying to be prepared.

Love relationships are not an achievement that needs to be achieved, but make space to grow. This means that relationships need to be based on mutual trust so that both people can grow together. If caught, make someone run and not grow.

Everyone has been rejected, hurt, and broken heart. This unexpected experience often makes us stop believing. But it turns out, according to Kim, that belief determines a person's experience. If you stop believing in ideal love, then we will never experience the love we dream of. So, never stop believing it will be lighter in realizing a harmonious new love relationship.