Tips For Parents Teaching Children The Consequences Of Behavior

Illustration (Gustavo Fring/Pexels)

JAKARTA - Mistakes are an unavoidable part of life. This is especially true during childhood, precisely when children try this in learning life. Almost every parent can prove the frequency of children making mistakes. Starting from breaking toys to breaking rules. What needs to be remembered is, these mistakes, both big and small, are part of the child's development.

Given this challenge, one of the best ways for parents to help their children learn from mistakes is to clarify the relationship between actions and the consequences of children's behavior concretely. However, it is important to realize that there are two types of consequences, namely natural and logical. And according to a 2018 study, according to Psychology Today, Tuesday, October 1, emphasizing these two consequences appropriately is one of the most successful ways to reduce your little one's disturbing behavior.

Natural consequences occur without other people's intervention. These consequences are the direct result of children's mistakes or bad behavior. For example, if a child forgets to keep his toy even though his pet anabul likes to bite, the natural consequence is that it will damage the toy. Then, if the child leaves dirty clothes on the floor instead of placing it in the basket, the natural consequence is that the clothes will not be washed.

The result of his actions occurs naturally, so that lessons become clear and direct. This is a simple causal scenario that helps children see the direct impact of their actions. Natural consequences directly affect the way a person learns and faces the rules of life, but those consequences need to be used intelligently in order to have a positive influence. In this way, these consequences must be sought first, but replaced by logical consequences if not appropriate.

On the other hand, logical consequences require a little intervention, but these consequences still follow the child's logical behavior. For example, if a child leaves his toys in the whole living room, you can take and store them in places they cannot access for a while. A logical consequence is that the child has to live without his toys for a while.

If the child speaks rudely to his siblings, the logical consequence is that it requires him to spend time separated or do something good to make his brother make up for his mistakes.

Some natural consequences are not suitable for children to experience, especially when it comes to safety or injury. In this case, logical consequences will be much more impactive and secure, especially if natural consequences are described as well.

Logical consequences help children understand that their actions have predictable results, even if others need to step in to explain their lessons. However, keep in mind that logical consequences made in anger are punishment, not learning experiences. Also, friendliness and encouragement must always be prioritized.

According to a 2019 study, parents should be empathetic and careful when explaining the relationship between actions and consequences:

Tell the child they are responsible for his choice. This is especially important for natural consequences, which can be abstract for small children. For example, "If you don't clean up your toys, the dog might bite it." And if natural consequences happen, remind your child gently about the relationship: "Remember, we've talked about how letting your toys lie can cause this."

Discuss logical consequences before implementing them. Talk to your child about what will happen if they continue certain behaviors. For example, "If you don't finish your homework, you have to finish it while playing the device."

Make sure the logical consequences are related to these behaviors. These consequences must follow behavior logically. For example, if a child doesn't clean up his toys, they won't be able to play them for a while. Explaining this relationship clearly is very important for the child to understand that he has options in action and subsequent results.

Next, give him a choice. This gives children the authority over the situation as well as instills responsibility for their behavior. For example, if their homework is not finished, you can ask your children what the right consequences are or offer options, such as, "You can complete your homework and then play the device, or you can stop playing the device today." However, in the end the choice is in your hands in this process.

Through natural and logical consequences, children learn valuable life lessons before being forced to learn in a difficult way. The key is to ensure the relationship is very clear and the consequences are enforced consistently. In this way, children can effectively learn the relationship between what is being done and what happens next. Which is an important part of helping children learn and grow from mistakes in a safe and supportive environment.