Difficult To Escape From Abusive Couples, Here Are 6 Reasons

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JAKARTA - Loving an abusive couple is not unusual. There are many reasons why this can happen, especially if love comes before its abusive behavior sticks out.

When you start to realize your partner's abusive behavior, of course all the admiration you have for your partner doesn't necessarily disappear. This makes you wonder why you still love people who hurt you, even leaving it is difficult.

Reported by VOI from the Psych Central page, Thursday, August 22, here is the full information.

When denying something, the mind will try to protect yourself from feelings of discomfort and sadness. This is a survival response to pain. Denials can be realized in many ways. For example, you believe that your partner has never committed acts of violence. As a result, you find other names or explanations for some of the couple's behaviors that are actually clearly what he is doing is an act of kdrt. So, you will continue to love and survive with your partner who commits violence because you don't believe it happened.

Violence in love relationships can sometimes occur in four different phases, which is referred to as the cycle of violence.

Such phases are:

Although this cycle does not necessarily happen for all situations, the last two parts that can make you continue to feel feelings for your partner. You will often remember the things you like about him and believe your partner to be abusive only at certain times. This can also take a while to stop you from leaving him.

There is no reason for someone to deserve to be hurt in any way. However, there are some mental health conditions. Which can cause you to unconsciously engage in this type of relationship and fall in love with an abusive partner.

Research shows that certain personality disorders are also associated with higher possibilities for women to be in an abusive relationship. These include personality disorders of skizoids, avoidants, borderlines, and dependencies. Some of the symptoms that arise in these conditions include feeling of low self-esteem, dependence, and being too resigned. Childhood trauma and unsafe attachment styles can also increase the chances of establishing and maintaining relationships with an abusive couple.

Some abusive couples may use manipulation tactics that can make you feel unsure and confused about your emotions and what steps to follow. For example, people with eccentric personality disorders engage in psychological play that can make you fall in love with him and feel bound by this relationship. He also acts as a victim at certain times, in order to cause empathy and pity for you.

Tactics, including gaslighting or projection, can also make you unsure of yourself and your feelings. This can make it difficult to understand why loving someone who hurts you.

When beliefs and experiences are not appropriate, you may experience discomfort. It's natural to want to avoid such discomfort. This is why natural responses to harassment may involve behavior or activities that minimize this feeling.

This response can vary. There are people who choose to leave the situation to avoid feelings of stress. But there are also those who choose to ignore, justify, or rationalize it.

This action may make it more difficult for you to distance yourself from your partner and teach yourself such actions. For example, rationalizing some of your partner's abusive behavior by saying "they had a difficult childhood".

Because you believe the acts of violence perpetrated by your partner stems from a bad past. So came the idea of helping your partner recover or want to be a savior for your partner. You may also think if you try harder or love him unconditionally, he will change. Even though empathy and affection are very important in human interaction. Taking that role, especially when you are injured, can keep you in a dangerous situation.