YOGYAKARTA – Good communication can bring many benefits in all relationships, especially in the personal sphere, namely in pairs. The benefits are definitely coveted by many, such as lasting relationships and deeper connections. However, it turns out that communication skills need to be honed. So it's important to recognize that the communication errors below can be catastrophic in a couple's relationship.
1. Rebuke
Repairing may be better than reprimanding. Reprimanding someone is often followed by the intention of being a victim so they tend to blame others. Not to mention if it is followed by aggression and rejection of a two-way dialogue. So it's important for couples to communicate feelings in good language, not criticizing, and focus on constructive or constructive dialogue.
2. Preaching
Transferring knowledge about morals and religion may be important. But responding to someone's behavior by preaching is not an effective way to build knowledge. This style of communication is also not suitable for partner relationships, according to Padraic Gibson, D.Psych., a clinical psychotherapy consultant, reported by Psychology Today, Thursday, August 10. This means that criticizing a partner's behavior can invite resistance and even more offense. It is important to understand, then, that preaching in this context rarely results in positive changes in a relationship.
3. Praise to criticize
Praising to criticize expresses the intention of cynicism. This technique creates a contrast between positive and negative statements that causes confusion and frustration. It can ruin even the strongest relationships. So, stay away from this toxic communication error and use a healthier way of dialogue.
4. Judgmental
Have you ever said “I told you so!” on your partner? This statement actually sparked anger. Because it implies that your partner doesn't listen to or value your advice. Such remarks can make your partner feel blamed, judged and develop negative emotions. So instead of spouting judgmental lines, focus on developing constructive dialogue with empathy and creating strong bonds.
5. Blame
We need to understand that everyone makes mistakes. There's no need to place blame, as it can cause emotional rebellion and create rifts in the relationship. So even if your partner is wrong, you can point it out without inviting a defensive reaction. Focus on how to make your partner understand and solve problems effectively.
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Those are communication mistakes that need to be avoided in relationships. It's important to know, learning how to communicate well takes practice. So build a communication model that is open, honest, assertive, and respectful to one another.
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