Making Boundaries Is Important, Here Are 7 Tips To Be Friends With Your Ex
JAKARTA – Communicating with important people in the past requires boundaries. Especially friends with ex-lover who used to be close in your days. So, in order not to get carried away by feelings or remember the good old times and then make a mistake, you need to set a strategy first.
Before following these tips, you need to know the position first. Make friends in the context of work or make friends in the realm of 'just saying hello'. If you and your ex already have each other's love lives, make sure to follow these 7 tips.
Make sure there are no feelings
This of course takes time to neutralize the feelings. Especially when you meet your first love, which is said to be hard to forget.
Not everyone easily adjusts the feeling from fourth gear to neutral. To be sure, you will not be able to make friends purely without any intention if there are feelings. More importantly, set boundaries for yourself and explain clearly to your current partner.
Watch the time
One week or five years, the situation will be different, related to the length of time you separated from your ex and then met again. So, count the time before contacting your ex and indicating that you are just friends.
Create boundaries
If friendship with your ex is important, then setting boundaries upfront will make the friendship successful. Well, to make this limit you and your ex-girlfriend must sit together.
Talk about how each other feels or don't touch personal emotions at all. This can help prevent confusing code.
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True friendship or friend with benefits?
These two relationship patterns are very different, first true friendship which really does not contain any intention other than friendship. Meanwhile, friends with benefits also need to make mutual boundaries to what extent the friendship will be forged. In order not to harm each person, the first option is the most recommended.
Laughing at the past
Are you and your ex-girlfriend able to laugh at the past? It means leaving the times when they were still dating and already having their own happier lives.
If you can laugh at the past and have a romantic relationship with each other, then pure friends are still at a safe level.
Make sure you both enjoy it
If you still feel hurt, it's better to torture yourself. Isn't friendship supposed to make a person happier? If you don't benefit from reconnecting, then it's better to maintain existing friendships other than with your ex.
Meet a lot of people
Keep meetings with ex-girlfriends casual. That is, with other friends when meeting with an ex. Avoid meeting the two of you and getting serious to provoke feelings.
According to a psychologist from the University of Kansas, United States, Rebecca Griffith in her research found that 60 percent of couples who have broken up remain friends.
Are you included?