7 Reasons Why Someone Avoids Joy And Positive Experience

Illustration of the reasons why avoid joy and positive experiences (Freepik/benzoix)

YOGYAKARTA Humans are mostly actively seeking pleasure. However, there is one condition behind a person avoiding joy and positive experiences. In fact, these two things make a person feel happy. According to a lecturer at the College of the Holy Cross and author of the book Unbroken: The Trauma Response is Never Wrong, MaryCacter McConald, Ph.D., an emotional experience that is imprinted and indelible may be one of the reasons why one avoids excitement or other positive experiences. In addition, McDonald provides an explanation of why one avoids positive experiences because the following is below.

People who have been traumatized sometimes get caught up in excessive vigilance. Called hypervigilance, is an increasing state when you find yourself constantly assessing the potential threats around you. Even when you are in a safe place, you still feel there is a threat.

When feeling joy, automatically reduces fear. This does make a person feel more vulnerable, and it feels scary because joy cannot be tolerated so he chooses to avoid it.

Emotions are actually the way a person prevents certain situations due to trauma. His emotions are not too strong to bear, so they are turned off to be more selective. This also results in reduced positive emotions.

Trauma can interfere with And's ability to accurately interpret and respond to emotions. Feeling intense emotions can upset you even if it's a positive emotion. This confusion can make positive emotions feel like a trigger that causes avoidance.

If you've been traumatized, you may know very well how critical happiness is. Possive emotions can be lost in an instant and this experience automatically raises the mind 'Oh no, this will end. It's better to avoid it than to get sick from losing it'. Apparently, this is most likely a source of waiting-for-other thinking and anticipating tragedy after experiencing something positive.

If a person experiences positive emotions which then the next situation turns it into a traumatic one, it can create a strong relationship between positive emotions and negative events afterward. So this can lead to an unconscious avoidance of joy and or positive emotions because they are afraid that their condition will turn into a traumatic situation.

Although this is baseless, according to McDonald as reported by Psychology Today, Wednesday, August 30, trauma survivors often feel guilty or embarrassed when experiencing joy after experiencing a traumatic situation. This may happen in cases of guilt in survivors, which can be in the form of guilt for surviving when others are in a bad situation.

Trauma can greatly affect a person's self-esteem and identity. The reason is, after experiencing trauma, a person internalizes the belief that they are basically damaged or destroyed. This makes it difficult for them to lean on joy because they feel they shouldn't get it.

As an expert who often handles clients with certain traumas, McDonald suggests a simple step to overcome avoidance over joy and positive experiences. First, by feeling the joy that is not too scary, for example seeing an amazing object like a rainbow soap bubble. This practice is adapted from Peter Levine's coaching concept, where the exploration of a troublesome sensation is managed gradually. This makes the nervous system adapt and process the matter without being overwhelmed.