5 Behavioral Patterns Influenced By Inner Injuries Of Childhood

Illustration of behavior patterns influenced by children's inner wounds (Freepic)

YOGYAKARTA - Every time we bring a childhood story behind a smile and adult attitude. However, sometimes difficult experiences in childhood such as violence, neglect, parental divorce, or living in domestic chaos can form patterns of personality and behavior that continue to be carried away to adulthood. Interestingly, these patterns are not without meaning. Often these patterns arise as 'protectors' to face pain and loss in the past. The following, behavior patterns that psychologically have something to do with childhood inner wounds.

One of the patterns that often arise is the high tendency to negative emotions, or in psychological terms called neuroticism. People with stressful childhood backgrounds tend to feel more easily anxious, sad, angry, or panicked. Once those emotions arise, they can find it difficult to go back to calm as before. According to psychologist Seth J. Gillihan, Ph.D., this could be the way the brain used to learn to stay "ready" to face the bad possibility. However, in times of adulthood, such intense responses can make life feel heavy and tiring.

Furthermore, patterns of anger and aggression can develop as a form of self-defense. Due to the difficulty of expressing pain safely as a child, some people learn that anger or being aggressive is a way to protect themselves from threats or harassment. Impulsiveness and anger, both verbally and physically, can arise without realizing it when negative emotions arise. Gillihan explained as reported by Psychology Today, Friday, December 5, this habit can also be a legacy of what used to be witnessed or experienced in the home environment. However, this pattern can cause continuous conflict in inner relationships and loneliness.

For some people who have been hurt in childhood, building relationships with others is difficult and tiring. They may prefer to 'walk alone' rather than work together or be cooperative with others. The difficulty of socializing can arise from distrust, hurt, or reluctance to reopen. As a result, they can often experience conflict or feel isolated in social interactions. However, this pattern often becomes a protector so that it is not easily disappointed or hurt again.

Another pattern that may arise is the excessive focus on external achievements such as career, status, or wealth. For people who grow in instability, achieving material or social success can be felt like a way to prove self-worth or cover a sense of insecurity from the past. The push to 'big success' could arise from the need for compensation for emotional trauma.

However, when achievement becomes the main goal, inner pressure often arises, excessive anxiety, or feelings that any achievement still feels lacking. This can make happiness difficult to achieve, because the focus is not on 'meaning life', but 'appears successful'.

Interestingly, even though there is a strong urge to be successful externally, many people with an inner wound background actually experience difficulties to really get involved or feel they have a purpose in life. They can find it difficult to find activities that give meaning, feel less enthusiastic, and often feel empty even though they seem 'successful' from outside. Difficulty completing tasks, difficulty feeling proud of achievement, or feeling that life feels monotonous often are some expressions of this pattern. His social life can feel cold or far away, who sometimes choose to not get hurt easily again.

Recognizing these patterns is not to blame yourself but as a conscious step to understand that childhood inner wounds can leave a trail in mature personality and behavior. Gillihan's message, it is important to remember that these patterns often appear as a form of personal protection. With understanding and support, this behavior can be changed. If you feel this pattern haunts you, consider sharing with trusted or professional people, so that the healing process can start running. Your childhood may make an impression, but you can still form your future with full hope.