According To Psychology, These Are 9 Reasons Why It's Difficult To Forgive Even Though People Are Loved

Illustration of the reason why it is difficult to forgive (Freepic)

YOGYAKARTA Humans never make mistakes, but forgive mistakes even if loved ones, it's not easy. Even revenge is still stored even though mistakes are three full moons apart. Why forgive is it difficult?

Upset and hurt is a negative emotion in a mechanism that ensures we feel safe from potential threats. There's nothing wrong with these feelings. It's actually strange if you're happy to be betrayed. Forgiving is one of the actions that voluntarily releases hostility with people who have hurt us. This involves changing your attitude towards the wrong perpetrators to regain self-help or be generous again.

Forgiving is certainly not forgetting. But by forgiveness helps a person rise from trauma to live a satisfying life after injustice has befallen him. Forgiving not only protects you from stress triggers, but also helps foster a positive mindset and improves mood. But despite its many benefits, this is the reason why it is difficult to forgive even if loved ones.

Not infrequently when we feel disappointed, we condemn and hold grudges. Language, there are those who are positive and negative. People who tend to remember negative words, it is very difficult to forgive. The curse sentence has the potential to destroy. If the negative word is remembered, we also cannot reflect on what happened and take the good side.

Hearing your loved ones say bad things about you in the back, is certainly disappointing. Maybe you choose to avoid discussing it and let it forget to eat time. Launching PsychoLogs, Thursday, October 10, it's natural to choose that but feelings of disappointment will never go away and even more gripping even though the person has apologized.

Thinking a hurt person deserves the same pain, it's hard to ignore. This is a sign of revenge and can't forgive yet. Someone who is still revenge never forgets the past, even after they take revenge.

Of course it is difficult to forgive someone who hasn't apologized from the start. But it's important to remember, to forgive someone not about them but about healing yourself.

Many people misunderstand acceptance. Including forgive people who make mistakes, are considered accepting their actions. Forgiving does not mean that person's actions are acceptable or true. On the other hand, forgiveness is a process of giving up hatred to continue your life.

Forgiving is a process, if it is difficult, it can be because the pain is still new. Extra efforts may be needed, but over time, most people accept that hatred will stop them. Like healing wounds on the hands or feet, it takes care and time to recover.

This includes a manipulative act, because sharing pain will get validation. The wound is temporarily covered if you take this car instead of forgiveness. But the pain has become a part of you and forgiveness doesn't come to mind.

Empathy and humanity have been replaced by intense competition and the need to demean others to be in medium so that they can progress. Forgiving someone can make us afraid of being vulnerable. Maybe feeling as if by forgiveness invites others to hurt again. So feelings like this make someone reluctant to let go and forgive.

It turns out that mistakes made by loved ones can hurt more. Even though there is actually no definite measure of pain. It's just that, when we trust someone and he makes a fatal mistake, it will take a long time to forgive.

Whatever the reason why it is difficult to forgive even loved ones, it is necessary to understand that forgiveness or forgiveness has a therapeutic effect. We often close our eyes to avoid anger and choose to let events that leave wounds closed in time. But it must be understood that forgiveness is a gift for yourself that allows you to reach peace in life.