Accepted As It Is To Get Emotional Security, Important In Healthy Relations

Emotional security illustration is important in healthy relationships (Freepic)

YOGYAKARTA Emotional security is important in a healthy relationship. Without this aspect, one cannot love well or even find it difficult to build a prosperous life. Emotional security is a deep feeling that is felt when those closest to you do not scare you to be yourself. In everyday life, you are embraced and accepted as it is by your partner, for example.

The reason why emotional security is important explains where the roots come from by Brenner's Helene psychologist Ph.D. and partner therapist Larry Letich, LSCW-C. Emotional security is based on fundamental needs, namely physical security.

At the age of the first 12 years of human life, during the first 6 years we were almost unable to protect and care for ourselves. We depend on nurses - or parents - to be able to meet the needs, whether eating, drinking, having a comfortable rest. This close system is important in safety in survival. Without having such a system, we cannot maintain a safe and emotional life that supports it. Emotions consist of love, anger, fear, sadness, happiness, shame, and disgust. This emotion can be the driving force to break the relationship.

When you feel emotionally safe with someone, your heart rate and breathing will be synchronous. Stress is reduced, muscles are more relaxed, and can express more positive and negative thoughts and feelings. In fact, with emotional safety, you can tolerate physical pain when with your loved ones.

Emotional sense of security is needed for someone to feel fine with themselves. It's different when they don't feel emotional security. Because emotional security comes from feelings of love and being accepted for what it is, feelings of insecurity come from the opposite. Unacceptable feelings, not worth being loved, even insulted. It stems from emotional attacks, such as being underestimated or ignored. Launching the explanation of Brenner and Letich reported by Psychology Today, Wednesday, August 14, the lack of emotional security can also stem from a lack of physical touch and comfort.

Research exploring images of the brain. Social rejection can activate the same pain center in the brain as physical injuries. That is, for the brain physical and emotional pain is basically the same thing. So if a person doesn't feel emotionally secure, physical pain can also be felt. When feeling chronically insecure, it will be very burdensome for themselves and can even be scary for others. Well, that means when people feel emotionally safe, their emotional system calms down and becomes more sane.

Having a safe emotional system does not mean never expressing anger or other negative emotions. But how to create a home that respects vulnerability, anger, respect, compassion, and free expression appropriately.