6 How Parents Validate Their Children's Feelings So That Their Mental Health Is Maintained

Illustration (Ketut Subiyanto/Pexels)

JAKARTA - The task of parents in educating children is not only to teach good things, but also to help validate children's feelings. One way to validate children's feelings is to apply the concept of mindful parenting.

Danielle Wade, LCSW on the Psych Central page, Tuesday, February 13, said that validating children's feelings can help maintain their mental health.

To find out more about how to validate children's feelings, continue to read the following article.

When a child acts something that can provoke your emotions, think carefully about the reactions that will be given. Instead of acting based on emotional impulses, it is better to take a deep breath, give a break, and check your body language.

Sometimes, taking a moment to check yourself out can make you separate yourself from what you're doing. Release stress feelings, and be emotionally present with your child.

Mindful parenting is a parenting practice that helps you learn to better understand moments with your children. Instead of worrying about the past or the future.

This approach can help you become more curious, kind, intelligent, and accept your child's emotions and actions because you will be more in line with them. Mindful parenting can also help you learn to be more empathetic and listen to your child actively.

A 2018 study summarized that mindful parenting can increase parental satisfaction and communication between parents, while reducing:

One way to validate a child's feelings better is by practicing a strategy called give a name and connect.

To do this, start by mentioning the emotions you see experienced by your child, then connect them with the reasons you observed.

For example, if your child is frustrated with a toy, you can answer with, You're very frustrated with those blocks, then see if they agree.

Accepting a child's feelings can be done in a simple way, such as sitting with him. Your acceptance can be a great source of strength for children. Avoid trying to change your child's feelings according to what you think should have happened in that situation. You can also try to reflect back on what your child said to you with a statement like, 'it makes sense,' or it sounds very difficult.

Asking open questions can encourage children to try to find words to express their feelings. And if possible, try not to focus too much on what happens and focus more on the experiences that children experience.

"Ask children to share experiences from their point of view and show empathy," said Wade.

'Tell him you'll feel the same way if it happens to you.'

If your child may be guilty, try listening to him before you do anything else.

"You can help change the situation after you hear all the points of view, but [still] admit that their feelings are real and understandable," he added.

An important part of emotional validation is taking action to improve relationships if a child's feelings arise due to conflicts with you, other family members, or friends.

For example, if the child feels ostracized while playing with you, consider asking his brother to apologize and find a way to involve them.

Or, if you upset your child, you can say, 'It looks like Mom/Father has annoyed you and Mom/Father understand why you feel like that.'

Then you can listen, validate, and try to cure the anger. An apology, if needed, can also be very helpful in curing children's inner wounds.