5 Reasons Why Communication With Partners Is Not Harmonious

Illustration of the reasons why communication with your partner is not harmonious (Freepic)

YOGYAKARTA Communication between two couples needs to run harmoniously to achieve the goal of a healthy relationship. Harmonic communication occurs when a partner can listen to each other and be open. However, if your partner rarely listens to or makes a distance by limiting communication, the reason is because the following.

A person who is prone to negative experiences, tries to make his partner feel safe. This is also the first reason why your partner is more closed and doesn't listen to what you say. According to Ruddy Faure and his colleague from Radbound University, people who have solid relationships tend to dampen negative experiences. Basically they love their partner, but because of negative things trying to be suppressed, it's as if your partner doesn't listen to your words. This is called an automatic attitude that assumes they have a shortage so they feel they have to reduce their negative attitude and not be good listeners.

Each partner has a negative and positive experience. The most significant effect, of course, is a negative experience. Because with a negative experience, a person can assume many things and make the conflict unresolved. So, this is also one of the reasons why your partner is closed, makes a distance, and is not a good listener.

Your partner who is not a good listener, may come from your attitude. No need to blame yourself, but it's important to evaluate yourself. If your nonverbal behavior does not make your partner comfortable, it may contribute to your partner's reaction. For example, when you rarely smile, your partner will certainly make a distance. So, pay attention to your nonverbal attitude because it affects the response from your partner.

Because you think about many things, maybe a lot of words are missed. Times like this, your partner may need support or support. That is, maybe your partner is being filled with negative emotions. So it requires a positive response from you to make him feel comfortable or get support.

Your partner may listen to more than you think, according to psychologist Susan Krauss Whitebourne, Ph.D. reported by Psychology Today, Monday, October 30. However, because of the thin trust and the suspicion is too big, it makes you assume there is a problem. It also creates a problem of entanglement, so try to trust your partner completely so that the situation doesn't get worse.

To overcome the problem of unharmonic communication in a couple relationship, advises Whitebourne, try spending time together with your partner. Avoid talking about the same topic continuously so that an eye-constructing association. You and your partner can open new and more interesting chat topics.