YOGYAKARTA – For married couples, having a long distance relationship can be a challenge. In addition to keeping communication open, honest, and assertive, husband and wife also need to maintain warmth in the aspect of intimacy. A number of experts give advice on how to keep intimacy burning even in a long distance relationship, here's a list.

1. Recognizing fun things

Andrea McGinty, dating coach, offers advice. According to him, start slowly and identify what you and your partner find fun and sexy. You can start with a flirty text or photo and can move on to more intimate virtual encounters.

2. Make use of lovetoys

Another name for sextoys is lovetoys, which according to sex educator Zoe Ligon can be used by married couples who are having long-distance relationships. According to him, you can increase masturbation along with sex toys that are connected to each other.

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Illustration of how to maintain the intimacy of a long distance relationship (iStockphoto)
3. Connect creatively

Advice Damona Hoffman, dating coach, use internet connection creatively to warm up intimacy with your partner. It doesn't have to be sexy, he said. You and your partner can plan a night of play together or write a love letter that is considered a cliché. Of course, keep in touch in creative ways.

4. Plan a sexy call

When it comes to sex, sexting and screen-sex can be very helpful, says Jenni Skyler, sex therapist at The Intimacy Institute. He added again, you and your partner would have trusted each other so as to allow messages that are 'obscene'. But if you and your partner are already doing it, it means that self-indulgence via electronic connection can be very sexy, comments Skyler.

5. Make a list of activities for fun

Together with a partner, it is necessary to make a list together in one place containing a record of hopes and aspirations for the future. This can keep the discussion alive and fresh because of the many lists to do together. The purpose of making a list is to maintain intimacy and the things you want to try together.

6. Improve communication and practice self-care

According to relationship and intimacy expert, Ian Lavalley, talking about sex and intimacy when long distance requires tenderness. Also, be curious and present without any judgment. He also encourages partners to send text messages or make calls several times a day and at least one face time session per day via a smartphone or laptop screen. It aims to imitate what healthy couples who live under the same roof do.

In addition, every couple needs to practice self-care and experience sexuality to keep themselves in a positive mental state and feel sexy, suggests Hoffman. McGinty added, try to keep exercising regularly and create a sexual 'menu' to keep the spark of desire warm even though it's a long distance relationship.


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