5 Stages Through Each Couple In Romantic Relations

Illustration (Cottonbro/Pexels)

JAKARTA - In a romantic relationship, there are at least five phases or stages that each couple will go through. The five stages are, namely, unification, doubt and denial, disappointment, decision, and complete love. These five stages aim to build chemistry between partners and determine whether the relationship can last long or not.

Linda Carroll, MS, LMFT, a well-known couple therapist in New York, explained in more detail the five stages of romantic relationships as VOI quoted from the following Mind, Body, and Green pages, Tuesday, October 10.

The first stage in a relationship is the unifying stage or the honeymoon phase. This is a moment where you and your partner share each other's warmth, romance, and joy because they were first united as husband and wife.

If you are at this stage, you will feel as if you have found a "perfect partner", which is someone who is very similar and compatible with you. You feel like you always want to be together and here, the boundaries are often abolished. You and your partner seem to be integrated and excited to be in a relationship. Unfortunately, in unification mode, many people ignore the red flag sign of your partner because what you see is only good things.

The second stage is doubt and denial, where you finally start to really realize the differences between you and your partner. Some of the traits that were tolerable, slowly started to feel disturbing. The fight begins to surround the relationship because you and your partner are faced with differences between each other. Feelings of love are mixed with annoyance.

At this point, the ability to deal with conflict is very important. Learn how to defuse conflicts and deal with relationship problems while continuing to treat your partner with respect.

The third stage is the Disappointment stage. This phase feels like the end of the journey for some couples. The problems that previously could have been tolerated so that the relationship remained fine, now everything is sticking out. Usually at this stage, couples start to withdraw in relationships and don't try to find ways to maintain a relationship.

The fourth stage in a relationship is called Decision. At this stage, you make a decision, whether to go, stay and do nothing even if you are suffering a lot, or stay and really try to improve this relationship.

The fifth stage in a relationship is Love Enthusiasm, where relationships are in the most healthy and most beneficial conditions. This is a romantic moment when the result of the couple's hard work to survive a household storm is ready to be enjoyed. You experience true individuals, self-discovery, and acceptance of imperfections both in yourself and your partner. And realize that there is no such thing as a 'perfect couple' in this world.

Even so, efforts must still be made in this fifth stage. However, you and your partner both know how to listen well and tend to have uncomfortable conversations without feeling threatened or attacking each other.

Keep in mind, this stage of romantic relationships is cycled, not linear. Where, the couple who have reached the fifth stage in a relationship, namely Cinta Menyakiti Hati, will eventually return to stage one, namely unification to start the process from scratch again.