Psychologists Call Family The Key To Instilling Good Habits To Children

Child And Family Psychologists In Bengkayang Regency, West Kalimantan Agatha Sagita Ria, S.Psi., M.Psi together with orphanage children (ANTARA)

JAKARTA - Child and Family Psychologist in Bengkayang Regency, West Kalimantan Agatha Sagita Ria, S.Psi., M.Psi explained that family is the key to instilling good habits.

"Families as the smallest unit of society are the first and main schools for children. So that families have an important and key role in shaping children's character, good habits and personality," he told Antara, Sunday.

The psychologist who graduated from Gajah Mada University also added that his own family must have a strong foundation to build family resilience.

"It's like building a house has never started by building the window first or the roof first, of course what is considered and prepared for the first time is the foundation. Now, the quality of this foundation determines the quality of the house. Likewise when we build a family," he said.

He mentioned that there are three foundations in the family, namely relationship, communication and language of love.

"It is important that families have healthy relationships, relations are not only between children and parents, but also fellow parents, namely husband and wife relations, do not create good people and bad people in the family," he explained.

A good relationship is that husband and wife must be united and agree. For example, when mother forbids children from playing gadgets, then father should not allow it. Father and mother must also be able to respect each other, not to badmouth each other in front of their children. It's like saying that her mother likes to nag.

Likewise in terms of communication. Communication must have openness, acceptance and trust between family members. In addition, parents must be able to become children's friends so that they can have one frequency with their children.

"Parents enter the world for their children to seek their pleasure, show them acceptance so that they are comfortable close to us. If they are comfortable, the child becomes easier to open," he said.

He also reminded parents not to be negative when their children are open about their mistakes. When children are honest about their mistakes, don't be scolded, even though they don't meet the expectations of parents because in the future the child tends not to want to be honest anymore.

"So if the child is willing to be honest, even though to be honest it admits mistakes, just accept them and don't forget to be appreciated, because he already wants to be honest. Then slowly we advise and children must also be invited to talk often, not spoken to," he explained.

Furthermore, there is another important element that becomes the foundation in the family, namely understanding the language of love of each family member. Each family member may have different language of love.

"We know the language of love from our partner and tell them the language of love we can help and the couple feels loved and appreciated," he explained.