4 Ways To Love Yourself By Accepting Lacks
YOGYAKARTA Being yourself should be done without a burden. But because of personal and cultural expectations, building trust for careers, or people's beliefs, one wants to look perfect. Sometimes because they are worried it is considered not ideal, but using a tiring top?
Someone who doesn't accept self-deficient, tends to ignore their self-needs. They constantly want to look ideal or perfect in the eyes of others. They may also be afraid of failure. According to author and psychologist Steven C. Hayes, Ph.D. reported by Psychology Today, Sunday, December 15, loving yourself requires courage. The reason is, he must be ready to accept his shortcomings and give up external expectations or from the environment and beyond himself. Hayes advises, this is how to love yourself by accepting his shortcomings.
It is important for a person to recognize and observe the roles and expectations that have been undertaken so far. When you recognize it, you will know when you feel compelled to act in a certain way and hide certain parts from within. For example, when you are afraid to be considered weak, when you are afraid to disappoint others, or when you want to be judged well. Recognizing these patterns needs to be identified to find out the reasons why you hide your shortcomings.
A person will be easily frustrated when many seek external validation. Keep in mind, getting validation is often done so that others can accept it, feeling safe, or meeting the expectations of loved ones. When doing so, avoid self-judgment. Better face reality with kindness. Hayes advises, imagine talking to yourself like a close friend. Support and encourage yourself to try, not to cover up deficiencies but fix them and be yourself.
Expectations often come from outside, but the values held come from within. So that the two of them are in sync, take time to reflect on what is important for you. Not what you think is important. Writing a journal, Hayes' advice, is important to provide self-information.
The values held serve as compasses that help you live life in a meaningful and authentic way. So, recognize and clarify what you hold and ultimately help identify things that are important to yourself.
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Life being yourself does not mean removing a mask overnight. Being yourself means making small choices in line with the values you are holding. Make sure every step you take strengthens the belief that you are not only worthy of meeting external standards, but because you are completely there, including the shortcomings you have.
Hayes' message is why we have to love ourselves, because shortages are not obstacles. Lacks are part of humanity and should, you have no doubt to be present as a whole as yourself.