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YOGYAKARTA – Regarding empathy, the expert said that this social concern does not need to be followed by overreaction. A person may want those around him or her to feel safe and comfortable expressing sadness, for example. This is a form of empathy. But is it necessary to take responsibility for the sadness that other people experience even though they are the closest people? It turned out that the expert answered, no need to do that.

Most people want someone to listen with compassion. They want to safely articulate their feelings. With empathy, you can show you care. For example, by listening to complaints according to your capacity. You can also empathize by paying attention. But acute sensitivity includes an openness to emotional energy, according to Marcia Reynolds, PsyD., as reported by Psychology Today, much worse for mental health.

By being overly empathetic, you will feel stress, anxiety, and anger because it will absorb more of the emotional energy of the person you are paying attention to. If you allow these emotions in your body, then not only the body is exhausted, but the mind is also emotionally hijacked.

terlalu berempati bikin hormon kortisol tinggi
Illustration of being too empathetic makes the hormone cortisol high (Pexels/Kelly L)

Reynolds says uncontrolled empathy can cause the concentration of the stress hormone, cortisol, to rise higher and higher, making you prone to feelings of depression or hopelessness. On one occasion, these intrusive feelings can disrupt relationships. Because if you overreact to non-close people, they will stay away. They may even feel unappreciated, belittled, or weak when you give them help they didn't ask for.

The response you perceive as 'support' can undermine their sense of security and trust. They may no longer feel that you can be a safe place to express themselves. Reynolds advice, to keep empathy non-reactive and others feel safe, try to be open-minded and non-judgmental. This means that you don't need to be critical of other people's situations but still be a good listener.

Additional advice from Reynolds, we can accept, appreciate, and become listeners of other people's expressions. But let that empathy be lived without having to judge and feel responsible for resolving or even criticizing the situation experienced by others.


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