5 Reasons Why Someone Often Apologizes

Illustration of the reasons why someone often apologizes (Freepic/cococoie_studio)

YOGYAKARTA Too often apologize, known as over-apologizing, it turns out to be possible because it is to please other people. For people who have this habit, it is called people-pleasing. Have you ever felt that you apologized too often even for things that weren't your fault? Come on, we explore the psychological causes that are common so that someone often apologizes.

A person may apologize excessively for his strong desire to please others. This can arise from the habit of avoiding conflict or wanting others to feel comfortable even when you are completely innocent. According to psychological therapist reported by Psych Central, Friday, August 15, with people pleasing, over-apologizing is motivated by the desire to regulate other people's emotions and makes them feel good. This habit has often been embedded for a long time and without realizing it in order to maintain harmony.

Sometimes feelings of guilt arise even if you don't need to bear it. Many of us raised feel responsible for the mood or condition of others. This guilt can be exacerbated by perfectionism. For people who experience it, he will feel always lacking, then apologize for small things, for example, slow in replying to messages.

If a person has low self-esteem, maybe he feels too disturbing or inappropriate and it is expressed through "sorry" over and over again. People with low self-esteem feel unfit for attention or other people's time, so apologize for just talking or asking for help. Many psychologists refer to low self-esteem as an important root of this habit.

Often apologize even when you don't make mistakes can also come from trauma reactions. For example, if you used to live in a harsh environment where the word "sorry" became a way to survive. According to psychologists, trauma victims sometimes learn to make themselves as low as possible so as not to provoke anger or violence. In addition, in certain cultures, especially those that place women as harmony guards, they are trained to often apologize as a manifestation of low self or social compliance.

The habit of apologizing excessively can damage your image in the workplace or in a professional relationship. Reported by Psychology Today, saying sorry too often can interfere with your career because it is only used to get validation from other people. In addition, often apologizing can make you look insecure. Ironically, saying sorry too often makes people no longer listen to your opinion because it is considered insensible or incompetent.

Habits of often apologizing sometimes not on time, need to be changed. Strategy to reduce it, consciously, replace it with thank you, hold back the reflex, and strengthen self-compassion. The strategy to overcome this can start slowly and respect the process.