Married Lesbian Couples Are More Likely To Divorce Than Gay Male Partners

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JAKARTA - New data from the Office for National Statistics (ONS) published on November 17 shows that while lesbian couples make up more than half of same-sex marriages in England and Wales, they are responsible for nearly three-quarters of same-sex divorces.

Five years since the introduction of same-sex marriage in England and Wales, there were 822 divorces between same-sex couples in 2019, nearly double that reported in the previous year. Of these, 589 were female partners and 233 were male partners.

The ONS said the overall increase in same-sex divorces "reflects an increase in the size of the same-sex married population since 2014", although divorce between same-sex couples still accounts for less than one percent of all divorces.

The median duration of marriage for same-sex couples who divorced in 2019 was 4.3 years for men and 4.1 years for women. This shows that many couples who separated were among the first group to marry.

Adultery was the most common reason for divorce between same-sex couples in 2019, at two-thirds. Followed by an agreed separation.

Kanak Ghosh of the ONS Vital Statistics Outputs Branch said: “Same-sex couples have been able to marry in England and Wales since March 2014. Since then, we've seen the number of same-sex couples divorce increase every year from a very small figure in 2015 when the first divorce took place, to more than 800 in 2019, reflecting an increase in the size of the same-sex married population in England and Wales.

“While we saw that 56 percent of same-sex marriages occurred between women, nearly three-quarters of same-sex divorces in 2019 occurred in female partners.

"Unreasonable behavior, including adultery, was the most common reason for divorces among same-sex couples this year as nearly two-thirds of couples divorced for this reason."

The 2020 divorce statistics, which won't be published until the end of 2021, will likely be the result of a volatile study. The reason is, the lockdown is believed to have pushed many couples to the brink of separation.

Why Are Lesbians More Likely To Divorce?

There is no clear statistical explanation for why divorce rates among lesbian and gay men differ so significantly, even though female partners are more likely to marry at a younger age.

Stonewall co-founder Lisa Power previously told The Economist that the number of lesbian couples divorcing may have something to do with U-hauling.

U-haul syndrome is a stereotypical lesbian relationship, referring to the joke that lesbians tend to move together on second dates. This indicates an extreme tendency towards monogamous or committed relationships. This can be considered complementary or pejorative, depending on the context.

Looking at the statistics for partners of the opposite sex can also provide an explanation, as women are overall more likely than men to initiate divorce proceedings, with two-thirds of them being initiated by women.

Ayesha Vardag, president of divorce firm Vardags, also told The Economist that she believes this may be because women are less tolerant of infidelity.

Vardag adds, whether it's gay or lesbian, heterosexual or queer, the problems he sees leading to divorces among his clients are the same.

“(The cause of divorce) is adultery or domestic violence, not being listened to, the feeling of one party working hard and the other relaxing. All the same things emerge, "said Vardag.