Tips For Mothers, Here Are 7 Ways To Not Be A Perfectionist To Your Children

Illustration of tips for mothers not to be perfectionists (Pexels/Karolina Grabowska)

JAKARTA – Exemplary certainly needs to be shown to the baby. However, not being perfect does not mean experiencing failure. Psychologist and therapist, Claire Nicogossian, Psy.D. find many mothers who are perfectionists. They imagine things perfectly and look perfect in front of their children.

According to Nicogossian, as reported by Mother, Tuesday, March 8, when a child grows up, it also becomes a mother. Throughout the journey of life experience mistakes, repairs, and even failures. It's okay, Nicogossian provides a way not to be perfect as a reference. The following are suggestions or recommendations.

1. Loving and accepting yourself

Extraordinary mothers can love their children unconditionally. But sometimes you fail to love and accept yourself. Often there are critical voices from within the mind that are trying to humble themselves. This critique is about pursuing perfection, trying to turn it into positive self-talk.

2. Realizing that mothers play a role throughout life

Nurturing and nurturing children is a lifelong commitment. Starting from teaching, educating, caring for, guiding, loving, and supporting the growth of your baby throughout your life. Therefore, be someone who is closest to the baby even though they have their own choices for their lives when they are independent.

Illustration of tips for mothers not to be perfectionists (Pexels/Gustavo Fring)

3. Have limits

Boundaries or boundaries need to be had, especially in the role throughout the age of being a mother. A baby needs his mother to fulfill his needs. As children grow up, their needs will change. Then being available to your child is very important. But that doesn't mean you ignore aspects of friendship, career, hobbies, and the goals you want to achieve. That is, build healthy boundaries so that one role and another do not collide with each other.

4. Learn to apologize

When you make a mistake or make someone else feel impatient, apologizing is important. Apology skills can be possessed effectively. To avoid using this word, advises Nicogossian, apologize when you make a mistake or appear in behavior that affects the situation with your child.

5. Be open

Even if you don't agree with your child's response or opinion, you need to open up communication. In communicating, try to behave and speak kind words. Listen to them when you have something to say. Give them space to express their thoughts as it helps their development and confidence.

6. Spend quality time with the kids

Children need regular, regular quality time with you. So make a regular schedule and make it a priority every day.

7. Avoid taking your child's bad behavior personally

Giving children autonomy as they grow is important, says Nicogossian. This makes him more independent and minimizes conflicts that are triggered by small things. His advice, try to communicate what the child has done, even if it's bad, don't get carried away when they do it.

Lastly, in addition, let the children be themselves. Sometimes giving directions is necessary. Keep in mind, provide guidance, love and support from you.