JAKARTA - Many things can make your little one disappointed. A closed playground, a favorite ice cream that is out of stock at a regular supermarket, a playmate who doesn't come, or a grandparent who doesn't attend the birthday party. Disappointment can be overwhelming for them. But it turns out, it's also not good if parents are too protective to protect them from feeling disappointed.

"The ability to feel disappointment, endure it, and then bounce back, is critical to a child's mental health," says Donald Rosenblitt, MD, clinical director of the Lucy Daniels Center for Early Childhood in Cary, North Carolina. Small disappointments will make children trained to build self-strength. Children become more independent, and free from outbursts of the little one's anger. According to Rosenblitt, anger often results from helplessness. So, if children are able to help themselves, they will feel better.

If you refrain from helping your little one and 'let' him feel disappointed, he will feel that he can deal with the disappointment. So, don't rush to buy a new toy to replace the broken one. The following steps (age-appropriate) will also help your child recover from his disappointment:

Age under 2 years old

Acknowledge or validate their disappointment, then move on. The period of attention and memory of children at this age is still very limited. It's okay to wear something to distract him. Lift it from its place, and move it to another room and give it a different activity. The colorful basins and cups will immediately distract him.

2-3 years old

Give phrases that can help them explain the emotions they feel (at this age children are not necessarily able to express feelings). Say, "I know you're sad," or, "I know you're angry."

Meanwhile, for children who are younger, substitute activities will treat liver wounds. Playing chase around the house often reduces sadness. Likewise hugs while reading a book.

4-5 years old

Have small talk with your little one. Because the vocabulary of children at this age has begun to grow, some children are able to express their disappointment frankly. Make sure you also respond from their point of view. "You're right, sadly, yes, that Becky moved." Then give suggestions so that he can overcome his sadness. "Just write Becky a letter, she'll be happy to receive it."

Age 6 years and over

At this age children are not too easily disappointed. Even if it happens occasionally, they already have enough understanding to start putting things in context. Especially if you use humor.

Don't fight sadness, but give your child a new perspective. "If an elephant falls and hits our house until it collapses and we have no place to live, it's okay, you cry and scream. But, for the problem of not getting the free toy, you can be sad, but you don't have to scream like that?"


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