9 Assumptions That Make Confidence Don't Grow

Illustration of assumptions that make confidence not grow (Freepik/fabrikanasimf)

YOGYAKARTA Confidence is correlated with higher welfare. Confidence is also the basis for building good interpersonal relationships. Because of the importance of self-confidence, it is important to recognize mitigating things. These include negative self-perceptions, parents' expectations, peer pressure, and/or rejection from friends or loved ones. A challenging relationship and trauma and loneliness also affects one's confidence. Not to mention the bigger factors, social and cultural conditions around.

Not only children feel the need to practice building confidence. Even adults, also often have low self-confidence. In addition to the factors mentioned above that can weaken confidence, erroneous assumptions to limit our ability to develop confidence, psychological flexibility, curiosity, and decision-making. Michele P. Maidenberg p., Ph.D., MPH., LSCW-R, CGP., explains the following assumptions that make confidence not growing.

Emotional and psychological discomfort is indeed challenging for thoughts and feelings. But that should not be avoided, because there are many things worth learning from emotional and physiological challenging moments. By covering ourselves up against discomfort, we are not in harmony with the things that should be understood. By better understanding, we will focus on growth and self-increase.

Thoughts and feelings are often a manifestation of certain fears, experiences, how you socialize and accumulate, and so on. Testing reality is important, but seeking validation can actually ignore reality. That's why thoughts and feelings need to be placed properly to practice acceptance and solve problems effectively.

Assuming that others are better than us, it will make us continue to compare ourselves with others. Comparisons are usually made to increase motivation and fulfill responsibilities. But often, it ends counterproductively and feels hopeless. It needs to be understood, explained Maidenberg as reported by Psychology Today, Wednesday, January 22, comparing tends to be degrading.

Naturally humans are not perfect. When criticizing yourself for making mistakes or doing things imperfectly, it makes us forget the lessons we should have learned. So appreciating achievement and relaxing capacity is the best way to adjust.

As adults, we have the ability to be selective and have preferences. Rejection is a price that must be paid when in a relationship. The risk is commensurate with joy. So it's okay if someone thinks you're not a fun person.

We tend to blame and embarrass ourselves to understand what is happening. When you do this, you lose the opportunity to understand the dynamics that may occur and understand yourself.

When you are constantly worried, adapting, and in a hurry to take conclusions, it means you don't give yourself space to build self-confidence and forge yourself to be more resilient. According to Meidenberg, the more confident you are, the greater you are at risk, challenging yourself in the face of difficulties, and realizing the importance of being grateful for your achievement.

To avoid selfish behavior, many people assume they have to think about other roles before themselves. Thinking about yourself, is necessary. So it's okay to set boundaries, express your needs, and be firm on yourself in the discipline of boundaries.

Overcoming conflict can foster a better understanding and deeper relationship. When overcoming conflict, there is a goal to learn something about yourself, learn something about others, and learn something about relationships that can help in moving forward towards the future. So, avoiding conflict makes self undeveloped.

The above is an assumption that can weaken self-confidence and better self-growth. So, what assumptions do you often think about?