6 Toxic Thoughts That Make Relationships Unhappy
YOGYAKARTA 'A toxic or toxic way of thinking', prompts a person to treat others badly. Such as attacking, commenting maliciously, and being defensive. Toxic way of thinking can also be destructive and have a negative impact on relationships.
Jeffrey Bernstein, Ph.D., a psychologist and author of a book on relationships, said that it is important to frame toxic thoughts so as not to spark problems. For example, when your partner is not talking much, think that he is busy but still loves you. With these thoughts, negative emotional turmoil, such as couples who feel they don't care, doesn't haunt your mind. Keep in mind, the following toxic thoughts can spark problems in a couple relationship.
This mind is often called all-or-nothing, which always considers the couple's treatment to be wrong and never does the right thing. This thought is full of explosive mines, so it's better to respect your partner's views, be calmer in responding to problems, and be more constructive instead of rigid.
Everyone makes mistakes, but it's not always like that. It means it's dangerous if you conclude that every behavior of your partner is a mistake. Better, ask yourself before the conclusions are put in order. Understand and be patient with your partner and yourself.
labeling someone, especially negatively, means forgetting their positive quality. For example, labeling your partner lazy. Bernstein advice, fix a negative label by restricting a supportive and positive behavior. For example, respect your partner when he intervenes to help you when you need something to repair your house.
Blame your partner for the problems that occur in relationships is certainly unfair. The reason is, relationships are established on the efforts of two people. That is, rational thinking is needed before pouring mistakes on your partner. Try to think that you are also responsible for your life choices.
Whether you or your partner, need to control emotions well. This starts with a clear and calm mind. If you are emotional with a short axis, it is difficult to handle reason, work well. So, improve healthy habits to take care of yourself, such as a healthy diet, exercise, and getting enough sleep.
Sometimes overactive imagination can lead to negative assumptions in relationships. For example, you can reach negative conclusions that are not based on reality. If your partner is busy in the office, doesn't that mean he's having an affair, right?. Better, Bernstein advises, try to trust your partner more but keep trying to communicate with each other honestly.
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The key to overcoming this toxic mind, Bernstein said as reported by Psychology Today, Friday, July 14, is to find and think about the quality and positive behavior of your partner. It is important to understand, a happy and satisfied partner with his relationship is not trapped in toxic thoughts. They think more realisticly, better, and healthier about each other.