Jealous Couple? Even Though There Are Positives, Also Recognize Aspects That Damage Relationships
Illustration of jealous couples who damage relationships (Freepik/stefamerpik)

YOGYAKARTA Jealousy is a complex emotion. Many trigger and consequences are also different. Experts and psychologists associate jealousy with pain, distrust, anger, and sadness.

Jealousy in the positive aspect, can reaffirm love and create persuasion to maintain commitment. But the negative is also not small, it can even attack self-esteem, assertiveness, and cause violence. Quoting David Buss in Why Jealousy Is a Necessary as Love and Sex, both men and women are bound to be jealous as solutions to reproductive problems and survival.

Men are jealous to protect their partner from sexual activity with their rivals for the purpose of ensuring hereditary ownership. In women, jealousy is because it is necessary to maintain the attention and love of their partner from rivals for the purpose of ensuring protection and survival. Based on the psychologist's interpretation Susanne B. Phillips, Psy.D., ABPP., men are more jealous of sexual infidelity and women are jealous because of the perse of the emotional environment.

Jealousy is also driven by a cultural understanding. That affirmation is very valuable, so competition and sexual opportunities have a big influence. Well, if it turns out that you often feel jealous or your partner is jealous, there seems to be no real reason behind it," Phillips wrote as quoted by Psychology Today, Friday, March 31. The driving factor, such as a sense of security, love capacity, feelings of danger, worry, self-criticism, boredom, even because it is isolated.

Through many factors, everything lowers confidence and raises concerns about losing a partner. But when your partner is not the only source of affirmation, for example getting support from friends, it can affect positively emotionally. It also changes the view of you and your partner.

But in fact, most of us have congenital denials. So sometimes it's hard to ignore feelings that lead to betrayal. Jealousy can be destructive, when there grows obsessive vigilance and possessive attitude that makes couples feel 'unliving'. On the other hand, jealousy is also building, such as building more open interactions, strengthening the trust that both parties do, allocating mutual time, and building mutual confidence.

Phillips advises, if the relationship between you is valuable, there is a way to stay close to full of love. For example, when in a relationship with friends, colleagues, tums, neighbors, or colleagues outside the relationship. In addition, you and your partner need to share their interests and make it difficult for each other to have an important position in their respective lives.

Most importantly, important people in life never find decision, loss, distrust, and space for jealousy. So, expel an isolated feeling of heated jealousy, try holding hands and full of love for a warm and harmonious relationship.


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