In Order To Connect Emotionally With Couples, Not Melluishing Needs Romantic Words
Illustration is emotionally connected to a partner (Unsplash/Candice Picard)

YOGYAKARTA Expressing romantic words to your partner, is a positive way to stay emotionally connected. But according to recent research, one doesn't just say love to stay emotionally attached. The research shows automatic affective reactions related to deep feelings you have with your partner. What is an automated affective reaction?

The study was conducted by Grace Larsen and colleagues at Dickinson College in 2022, who predict the relationship between partners is consequenceal due to the presence of automatic affective reactions. The affective reactions are automatic, and may not be expressed in words. But when these feelings exist, it can drive a satisfactory and lasting relationship.

This research refers to everyday life, where feelings and words are often not in line. For example, when you come home from work and are tired, your feelings encourage you to go home, hug your partner, and say words about how much you love your partner. But in reality, you think again about realizing these automatic reactions and just kissing your cheek while greeting short and then resting. Maybe this example is too personal, which everyone will experience a different reality.

Larsen then asked participants who followed his research to make daily books for two weeks. This daily book contains all their interactions with their partners and assesses the extent to which they have a positive and negative relationship. Positive relationships, for example, provide support while those who are negative are jealousy.

The time together with the couple on each participant is one of the variables that researchers also follow up on because it is considered an explicit perception of a relationship. It turns out that, from an overview of researchers, this explicit perception can turn into an implicit perception that does not need to be realized with words about positive feelings. Every day more and more time spent together, couples are more implicit in expressing their feelings. Unless you experience something dramatic that affects the relationship between the two of them.

Because this research is in a laboratory framework, it means it needs to be contextualized with everyday life. Susan Krauss Whitebourne's advice, Ph.D., reported by Psychology Today, Friday, October 28, try to create a list of feelings that appear in your head regarding your partner. Including whether it forms a safe network, happiness, pleasure, even just for you. This may be a fundamental connection that thunders as you perform your daily tasks.


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