5 Life Stages That Make Relationships With Siblings So Tense

Illustration of the causes of strained relationship with siblings (Freepik/Gpointstudio)

YOGYAKARTA – Family relations are warm when they live under one roof. This has to do with how siblings interact, especially if they live in different houses and even cities. In fact, estrangement often occurs when life changes so that it must redefine its role in the family.

The following conditions or stages of life have a major influence on the closeness and estrangement of siblings' relationships.

1. The period of building identity as a teenager

A brother growing up, they are more individual to create their own identity. They choose a path, such as leaving home, continuing their studies, or working. It is not uncommon for a sibling to choose to challenge parental authority and slowly leave his past behind.

2. Get a new family after marriage

Marriage is a stage that is experienced and changes almost all roles in the family. Especially when there is a condition that requires joining the in-laws under one roof. As a new daughter-in-law may have values and beliefs that are different from the original family.

But in one possibility that is often experienced, a person no longer has much time to care for his family because he is building a new family.

Illustration of the causes of strained relationship with siblings (Freepik/Gpointstudio)

3. Siblings focus on their new family

Married and then have children, some family members may feel left out because these two stages are experienced. Often the competition continues into adulthood and instead of embracing each other they stretch out from each other.

4. Separation and marital problems

When siblings are separated or experiencing problems in their marriage, they may need both emotional and financial support. But this is not easy for his brother, because it is quite burdensome. Sometimes it creates disagreements about how to handle the situation. This situation certainly makes the relationship between siblings uncomfortable.

5. Parental illness, death, or inheritance

Siblings may compete for power, love, and family loyalty. A difficult conflict arises over who makes the arrangements for the care or health of the elderly. Even who would inherit a precious family treasure, could trigger conflict. This issue can make your relationship so tenuous.

Citing the author's review of Brother, Sister, Strangers: Sibling Estrangement and the Road to Reconciliation, Fern Schumer Chapman reported by Psychology Today, there are still many factors that affect sibling relationships. Including family trauma, jealousy of siblings, parents' favorite children, to differences in political views can affect relationships. Chapman's advice, pay attention to risk factors to avoid breaking up. When experiencing the most vulnerable times, it is necessary to be wise.