Often Doubt Yourself, Here Are 5 Ways To Overcome Negative Self-Talk

Illustration of how to overcome negative self-talk (Unsplash/Sergiu Valenas)

JAKARTA – Negative self-talk can affect a person's self-esteem. Even self-doubt can affect cognitive and motor performance, weaken focus, and make a lot of mistakes. According to social worker and author who often works with teens with mental disorders such as schizophrenia, Katherine Schreiber, MFA., LMSW., judging yourself badly will not make you happy.

To overcome negative self-talk that makes you doubt yourself, you can do Schreiber's recommendations below.

1. Keep a daily journal

A daily journal is important, because writing negative statements about yourself can help build a new perspective. Negative self-statements are vague but extreme, such as “I suck,” or “No one loves me.”

Once the statement is written down, a grounded rebuttal can turn negative thoughts into the opposite. For example, when you feel bad, loved ones beside you can't accept if someone says you're a sucker. Conflicting events as counter statements neutralize self-doubt.

2. Fact-based affirmations

Schreiber suggested, affirmation of what has been achieved can be done. One way is to make a fact-based list from the most meaningful to the least meaningful. Also write about the setbacks that have been overcome. Affirmations, according to Shreiber, are affirmations that you are capable of going through many things, meaning you don't have to doubt yourself.

3. Learn about other people's mistakes

This way shows that we are not the only people who make mistakes and mess things up. Everyone has faults, and those moments can serve as lessons for both the subject and you.

Try asking the people closest to you, what is the biggest mistake that has been made and caused chaos. They'll probably talk a lot about how they got through the toughest situations and cheer up after overcoming them.

4. Do something that makes you feel better

Helping others, for example, can make you feel better. Little things you do for others, like opening a door, saying thank you, or helping a colleague in need often help us see ourselves as valuable.

5. Spend more time with supportive people

Spending time with people who criticize you or lower your self-esteem will not make you feel good. So when it's unavoidable, enlist the help of friends, family, or colleagues who validate your perspective, respect, and encourage you to strive towards your goals.

That's the recommended way to deal with negative self-talk and even self-doubt. Instead of wailing and being alone, it's better to open up and find the positive.