The Dilemma Between Love And Love, How To Distinguish It?

Illustration (Leah Kelley / Pexels)

JAKARTA - When undergoing a process of approaching someone, he often asks if he really loves or just likes it. Have you experienced it?

This thought is often annoying and makes it difficult for you to enjoy happy moments with him. Therefore, it is important to know the difference between love and liking so that you are not mistaken by him. Summarized from Elite Day, Monday, February 8, the following are:

Liking happens quickly, but loving is a slow process.

School of Love NYC's School of Love and Dating Coach Monica Parikh explains that the main difference between love and liking is the timing.

"Love understands that true intimacy develops over a long time and through the many seasons of life," she said on Elite Day.

This is of course different when someone is too obsessed with liking. They will stalk his social media, make plans, control him. Unfortunately, when trouble comes, couples who only like each other will not be able to survive.

"In a state of infatuation, when one partner hurts another partner, the trauma separates the relationship. In love, every partner sees trauma as a catalyst for intimacy and deep understanding," he added.

So that to distinguish it, you can see how the partner's attitude during the approach process. Does he immediately confess his feelings or go through a lot of processes and obstacles?

When you fall in love feelings will experience a lot of flow, while liking is not like that.

When in love, a man may feel a variety of feelings. This is because the testosterone in his body decreases, which can make him feel tired and depressed.

"When a man starts to fall in love, their testosterone levels drop. They may feel tired, moody, and may feel less sex drive, less weight loss, or muscle loss," says Alyssa Bunn, a professional matchmaker at Tawkify.

But on the other hand, when someone falls in love, he can also feel happy feelings.

"Not only are our dopamine, oxytocin and vasopressin levels at an all-time high, but our amygdala - our fear - is 'gone'," he explained.

Therefore, don't be surprised if he can get jealous when he sees you walking with other people. This indicates that there is a feeling of love in it. Also, please be careful when he tries to compete with others. It could be a sign that he is obsessed with you and doesn't necessarily love you.

Feelings of love grow, while feelings of liking are only temporary

LeslieBeth Wish, Ed. D, author of Smart Relationships and founder of Love Victory, told Elite Daily that the experience of love can change the more time you spend with your partner.

“As time goes by, the intensity doesn't go away, but instead becomes one of many positive feelings. "Happy long-term love partners say they feel peaceful, confident, empowered, and have other positive feelings," he explained.

Meanwhile, when someone likes someone else, he is only after something because of his obsession. Even this feeling can make a person uncomfortable.

Those are the differences between love and liking. So, now you can tell the difference?