JAKARTA - Imagine the following scenario. One day, you and your partner have an argument. Then, as usual, the communication between you became strained because your partner suddenly disappeared for a few days.
After making up, you confront your partner. But unfortunately, your partner's reaction was not as expected. Apathy, as if he/she doesn't care about you and your relationship.
Then, a random question pops up in your mind, what's wrong with him/her? What to do at a time like this?
First, if you think that only women are affected by various dramas in a relationship, then you are wrong.
A study from America conducted a study of 1000 unmarried couples and found that it was actually men who were more affected or depressed when fighting with their partners.
Researchers believe that this is because the majority of women have more close friendships than men, so they have a support system in times of conflict with a partner.
Compared to women, men mostly consider their partners as their 'emotional best friend'. So once men clash with their partners, then they will feel alone and will automatically lock their feelings and act okay.
In addition, men are actually less able to regulate their stress levels so it is likely that men feel very affected by conflicts in their relationships.
Therefore, men tend to do substance abuse by smoking or drinking alcohol to vent their emotional feelings.
Essentially, the assumption that women are the only ones who feel the most miserable when fighting with their partners is wrong. Men also feel this way.
Men are 'emotional ducks' who look calm and relaxed on the surface but are actually busy 'swinging their legs' or calming down the upset feelings at the bottom of their hearts.
So the next time you have a conflict with your partner and they seem like they don't care, please notice that they probably don't want to discuss it much with you. Actually, he/she feels the same way or even more than what you feel.
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