YOGYAKARTA In a couple's life, sexual desire is not always the same. Sometimes your partner is in the mood, but you are tired after work. This situation is not a problem, but how to respond it turns out to be researched and shows positive results when you try to please your partner in the sexual aspect.

Citing the presentation of the psychology professor, David Ludden, Ph.D., reported by Psychology Today, Monday, April 17, after a long day and spending time together with your partner, when your partner starts to touch and wants to make love, there are three choices that are common. First, tell honestly that you are not in the mood to make love. Second, just follow it even if you are not in the mood and will not enjoy the flow of love. Third, just follow it even if it's not in the mood and who knows your partner is excited so that you can find pleasure together.

Through the three options considered above, research shows positive things referring to the third option. The three responses above may not be entirely correct. Because the situation may be different. However, response number three means you are grateful for your partner's needs but also pay attention to your own needs.

In an article in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationship, exploring the benefits of placing your partner's sexual needs above your own needs. Exclusively recruiting 122 couples aged 19-67 years and long relationships 2-48 years. Every day for 21 days, each couple receives emails containing surveys and is asked to be filled before bed. They were asked to answer a series of questions to investigate relationship satisfaction, positive and negative mood, and sexual desire.

A number of couples answered During sex, it is impossible to meet my own needs if it goes against the needs of my partner. Finally, researchers measured couples-focused sexual relations, self-focused sexual relations, and sexual satisfaction.

The first result shows, fun your partner is half of your pleasure. In other words, your keitka tries to meet your partner's needs, in turn your partner tries to meet your needs. So build sexual satisfaction and relationships.

Second, sacrificing your need for your partner does not necessarily have a significant effect on relationship satisfaction. Because it turns out that research participants report that when they always meet their partner's needs without considering personal needs, there is no change in satisfaction. In short, sacrifices are not valuable if personal needs are ignored.

Ludden explained that a healthy relationship always involves giving and receiving. Love does need sacrifice, but it's good to be a little selfish. This means that every couple needs to communicate assertively referring to their respective needs. Even if they meet each other's needs, don't be afraid to tell your partner what you need.


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