Emotional Abandonment In Childhood Apparently Affects This Behavior

Illustration of emotional neglect in childhood and its effect on behavior as adults (Pexels/Mikhail Nilov)

YOGYAKARTA – The emotional aspect of experiencing bad things but being ignored or ignored for a long time is called emotional neglect. This emotional neglect, according to psychotherapist Kaytee Gillis, LCSW-BACS., contributes to how people recognize and express their feelings as adults. When a person experiences it, it is difficult to identify feelings and express them with the behavior below.

Angry when people don't pay attention

For someone who experiences emotional neglect, there is often a problem with his own existence. They can feel unimportant or invisible and get angry when others don't notice the little things about them.

Feeling left out

Although close friends, sometimes someone feels left out. Even though they have been involved in conversations or in social activities. This is often experienced by someone who experienced emotional neglect as a child. Gillis advises, focus on spending time with people who make you feel wanted and familiar. Recognize them as friends or family members. If you are no longer involved in intimacy, be honest with them about how you feel.

Illustration of emotional neglect in childhood and its effect on behavior as adults (Pexels/Josh Hild)

Feeling the need to 'fix' others

This could stem from a history of wanting to help a parent or caregiver who may have been struggling with mental illness. Children often feel a great responsibility to help protect their caregivers. However, you need to have limits because you can't work harder than anyone else.

Comparing yourself to others

It's normal to sometimes compare yourself to others. Especially if you are young because you are often judged on your appearance, actions, and in a certain way according to the boundaries of social groups. But if you're constantly comparing yourself, it's a sign that you have low self-esteem or lack of self-confidence.

Launching Psychology Today, Monday, August 22, the way to overcome this can be by instilling the perspective that everyone has different achievements.

Feel the need to explain yourself too much

If children are raised in an environment where emotions or feelings are humiliated or lead to punishment, they grow up with the message that certain feelings are bad. Many people who don't feel heard as a child tend to overexplain. This desire to overexplain is a defense mechanism used to keep them out of trouble.

To work around this, you need to realize that you don't owe anyone an excuse or explanation for your feelings. So take a deep breath and remind yourself that you are not in trouble.