Avoid Doing This So Your Child Does Not Feel Insecure

Bekah Russom / Unsplash

JAKARTA - Children often face their parents' nagging and even experience physical violence. Of course this will have a negative impact on children's growth and behavior.

Sometimes parents or people around us tend to think that childhood experiences and trauma have no impact on adulthood. Usually, this experience is not only from the parents, it can be attributed to relatives, friends or other family who become "poison" for the children.

Therefore, parents are required to maintain an attitude so that their children when they grow up do not bring bad experiences to them.

Chief Psychologist and Co-Founder of KALM, Karina Negara in the online event KALMnesia, Saturday, October 10, explained how to avoid this. According to him, there are some childhood experiences that can make us feel insecure or insecure .

- Be punished for trying to have a different opinion or behavior

- Left without explanation or threatened with abandonment

- Not appreciated for doing good things

- Forced to act as parents' decisions

- Don't cry or get angry

- Getting hit when you make a mistake

- Blamed when parents feel negative emotions

- Discipline when inconsistent

- Changing caregivers too many or often

- Often compared to other children.

From this series of things, Karina said that prospective parents or those who already have children must learn from their mistakes. Like being connected to an inner child for example.

"Connecting with inner children can make you improve the quality of interpersonal relationships. In addition, there is also peace in your heart and more confidence in welcoming the future, because you have fully understood yourself," Karina explained.

Included in Toxic Parents

But actually, the things above can also be related to the term toxic parents . Because the types of toxic parents also include violence, being overprotective, not ready or not knowing how to raise children, and giving up the responsibility of caring for children.

As a result, the child will have a bad childhood experience that has an impact on his adult life. For example, children can be someone who is labeled as a trouble maker .