How to Handle Families Who Like to Flex During Eid
JAKARTA - Responding to flexing behavior, especially during the Lebaran moment when many people gather, it needs to be done wisely. Instead of being tempted to compare yourself or feel you have to "compete", it is important to stay calm, focus on yourself, and maintain emotional conditions to stay healthy.
Not everything that others show reflects the true condition, so a relaxed and not excessive response is the key.
Clinical psychologist from the University of Indonesia, Phoebe Ramadina, explained that dealing with people who like to show off should be done with a neutral response and not get caught up in competition.
"A neutral response and not extending the discussion towards competition is enough, while still maintaining the awareness that what is seen does not necessarily reflect the actual condition," said Phoebe.
He added, the Eid moment that brings together a large family often creates a tendency to compare achievements and possessions.
According to him, flexing behavior is often related to the need for recognition or validation from the environment, so that it is considered successful or not behind others. This is also inseparable from a culture that often associates success with material and social status.
In addition, flexing can be a form of compensation for feeling insecure or worrying about being considered a failure. In some cases, this push even makes a person do various ways to look successful, even though it does not fully reflect the actual condition.
"In an era that emphasizes image, external appearance is often considered more important than authenticity, so individuals are willing to do various ways to meet these social expectations," he said.
Other factors such as social pressure in the family, fear of missing out (FOMO), and unstable self-esteem also affect the emergence of this behavior.
In dealing with family members who tend to flex, Phoebe suggests that individuals stick to their own values and standards, and maintain emotional distance if interactions start to feel exhausting. On the other hand, it is also important to cultivate empathy, because this behavior can be a way for someone to seek recognition.
In order for the atmosphere of Eid to feel more meaningful, he suggested that conversations in the family should not only focus on material achievement, but on things that strengthen emotional relationships.
"For example, by sharing life experiences, including challenges and lessons learned, recalling family memories, or giving each other sincere appreciation," he suggested.
In addition, discussing future expectations and asking each other about emotional conditions can open up a warmer communication space, so that togetherness is not only felt physically, but also strengthens a more supportive family relationship.