5 Psychological Reasons Someone Neglects Taking Care of Themselves, Even Though It's Important for Well-being

YOGYAKARTA - Taking care of yourself is often understood as limited to resting or pampering yourself occasionally. In fact, self-care is a conscious decision to maintain physical, mental, and emotional health on an ongoing basis. Many people actually want to apply self-care, but are unknowingly hampered by certain mindsets. Launching Psychology Today, Monday, December 22, clinical psychologist Evan Parks, Psy.D., explains the psychological reasons why someone often ignores self-care. The following is a complete explanation and recommendations that help you understand how to build healthier and more realistic self-care habits.

Why is self-care often overlooked?

The desire to take care of yourself often clashes with the demands of life, social responsibility, and inner pressure. In psychology, a person's behavior is greatly influenced by long-established beliefs. Not a few people are easily concerned about others, but it is difficult to pay attention to themselves. This is where self-care is often marginalized, not because it is not important, but because it is considered not a priority.

1. Consider self-care as a selfish act

Many people grow up with the belief that being a good person means always putting the needs of others first. As a result, when you want to take time for yourself, guilt arises. In fact, taking care of yourself actually helps you stay present and contribute optimally to your environment.

Illustration of psychological reasons for neglecting self-care or self care (Freepik)2. Thinking that strong people don't need self-care

There is an assumption that toughness is synonymous with the ability to withstand fatigue and pressure without complaining. This mindset makes self-care seen as a sign of weakness. In fact, ignoring your own needs in the long run can actually lower your physical and emotional resilience.

3. Feeling not worthy of taking care of yourself

Some people postpone self-care because they feel they have to reach a certain standard first. They think that self-care is only worth giving after being successful, productive, or meeting certain expectations. This mindset makes self-care continue to be delayed and life feels exhausting without a break.

4. Feeling that you don't have time

Busy often serves as the main reason why self-care is not done. Many people think that self-care must take a long time and requires ideal conditions. In fact, self-care can start with small steps such as getting enough sleep, eating regularly, or taking a short break to breathe calmly.

Illustration of psychological reasons for neglecting self-care (Freepik/wayhomestudio)5. Feeling that life is completely controlled by circumstances

When a person feels that he or she has no control over his or her life, self-care is also considered to have no impact. This belief makes individuals surrender to the situation, as if everything is determined by external factors. In fact, the response to the situation is a choice that can still be tried, including choosing to take care of yourself.

Start making changes in a simple way

Understanding the reasons behind neglecting self-care is an important first step. After that, you can start building new habits with a more realistic and conscious approach.

Start by recognizing the inner voice that often holds you back from taking care of yourself. There's no need to fight it hard, just be aware of its existence without having to follow every impulse. You can also imagine how you treat the people you love. What you want to give them, in fact, is also worth giving to yourself.

The next step is to start filtering things that enter your life. Whether it's activities, relationships, or habits, they all have an impact on well-being. With this awareness, self-care no longer feels like a burden, but rather a form of responsibility to yourself.

Ignoring self-care does not mean you do not care about yourself, but because you are used to living with an unhealthy mindset. By understanding the psychological reasons behind it, you can start changing your perspective and building habits that are more supportive of long-term well-being. Self-care is not a selfish act, but the foundation for you to stay healthy, balanced, and able to live a more quality life.