6 Healthy Ways To Solve Conflicts In Coupled Relationships
YOGYAKARTA In a pairwise relationship, of course, it is inconsistent with differences of opinion, dispute, even quarrels. The existence of conflicts handled in a healthy manner, makes relations more developed. On the other hand, if conflicts are often piled up, ignored, and resolved with ego height, it will damage the harmony of the relationship. For this reason, here are healthy ways to resolve conflicts in relationships according to the recommendations of psychology professor Gwendolyn Seidman, Ph.D. from fire College.
Expressing the problem is clearly different from harsh words. Gambalang means open, honest, not demeaning, and does not imply hostility. Ways to express indirect problems, will not build better relationships. Precisely with a clear and open picture making problems in relationships easier to identify and solve.
A statement that attacks and blames, can damage relationships. A more constructive strategy in discussing conflict in relationships, is to use a sentence based on my point of view "I am" accompanied by a description of behavior. Statements with your own point of view, can focus on feelings that are felt without blaming your partner and describe the specific behavior of your partner.
If you want to have a constructive conversation, focus on one problem at a time. An unhappy partner, according to Seidman as reported by Psychology Today, tends to drag many topics into one discussion. Since the more complaints you submit, the less likely the problem is that the trigger is actually discussed, let alone the solution.
It would be very frustrating if your partner didn't pay attention to you. So it's important to be a good listener and really pay attention to how each person in pairs expresses. You can show your partner that you are paying attention by using active listening techniques. When your partner talks, describe what they say. Repeat with your own words. This can prevent misunderstandings.
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When criticized, it is difficult not to take a defensive stance. However, being defensive will not solve the problem. That is, it is important to listen to your partner's complaints properly. Don't immediately object to the complaint but look carefully and find a middle way to resolve the conflict.
Positive behavior needs to be appreciated and appreciated. But for negative things, avoid feeling a burden in revealing it. According to Gottman, a couple who maintains humor, warmth, and a significantly smaller collaboration behaves negatively.
But it's also important not to demean and still respect your partner. Furthermore, how to resolve conflicts in a healthy manner in a couple's relationship, needs to be in a calm condition. Breathe deeply to calm your emotions and consider taking a break if emotions start to peak.